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Nature Thoguh
Contributed by
fielding88
on
Tuesday, 21st June 2005 @ 07:44:32 PM in AEST
Topic:
StoryPoetry
|
The Rain poured down that summer day,
On a lonely Maple Tree.
The Wind pitched in and made it sway;
It was such a sight to see.
Wind and Rain continued to pound
The Tree with awesome power.
The Sun’s light had yet to be found,
But the Tree did not cower.
The Sun lit up but did not halt
The havoc the duo made.
It was no judge; there was no fault,
and offered the Tree no aid.
The Tree just swayed and held its ground,
Having all the strength needed.
But lightning struck with thund’rous sound;
I saw that Tree defeated.
I ran out to see the demise
Of that Tree and wondered “why?”
But then I saw to my surprise,
Its Leaves were eerily dry…
Copyright ©
fielding88
... [
2005-06-21 19:44:32]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Nature Thoguh
(User Rating: 1 )
by hauntedscorp on
Tuesday, 21st June 2005 @ 08:34:26 PM AEST
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Glad to see your dry spell is over Marc! This is a really good write, with great flow and flawless rhyming. I like the way you present the rain, wind, sun, and tree...Almost like entities...You gave this poem some good descriptive qualities, and I must say, I enjoyed it!!
Scorp. |
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Re: Nature Thoguh
(User Rating: 1 )
by Rikki on
Tuesday, 21st June 2005 @ 10:13:09 PM AEST
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I enjoyed this poem as well! I could see it all!
Rikki |
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Re: Nature Thoguh
(User Rating: 1 )
by blowfish_jane on
Wednesday, 22nd June 2005 @ 04:47:35 AM AEST
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Marc, it's good to have you back and posting with us again.
This was a really brilliant write. I like the imagery you provided with your words. Hope to see more of this soon.
Jane xoxox |
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Re: Nature Thoguh
(User Rating: 1 )
by xXcrossedXx on
Wednesday, 22nd June 2005 @ 07:35:09 AM AEST
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I'm glad you're back! I guess it wasn't too bad you left because:
I have sucessfully read every single one of your poems posted here! :)
I am very proud of myself lol, but I am more proud of you, you're writing is breathtaking and full of meaning I love every line of anything you write.
As for this poem its so creepy! That ending is like a mystery/horror clifhanger, this is a wonderful piece! You did a nice job in portraying all the aspects of the rain,sun, lightening and tree.
Great write,
Amanda |
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Re: Nature Thoguh
(User Rating: 1 )
by Essentially9 on
Saturday, 25th June 2005 @ 09:40:49 PM AEST
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| i loved the last stanza the best. wonderful poem marc, how dare you succumb to being over ridden by writers block! excellent message, that shines brighter than the sun. |
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Re: Nature Thoguh
(User Rating: 1 )
by breny on
Sunday, 3rd July 2005 @ 04:23:04 PM AEST
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Marc, the stuff that you write about is so original and really creative! I couldn't come up with something like this even if my life depended on it.
I'm going through an enormous writting block too (seems to be happening a lot!) but I'm glad that you have come out of yours and are writting master peices again! It's great to have you back and I look forward to reading more!
~Brenna~ |
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Re: Nature Thoguh
(User Rating: 1 )
by ladyfawn on
Monday, 4th July 2005 @ 07:59:34 PM AEST
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hauntingly beautiful, i actually got chills at your end line! ha! hugs n' love nessa
@->>->:- |
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Re: Nature Thoguh
(User Rating: 1 )
by Fionndruinne on
Sunday, 10th July 2005 @ 01:33:07 AM AEST
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Ah, now there's a depth of metaphor in this piece which is very impressive. It's enough to get one thinking, as I think I shall be doing. Bravo!
Andrew
(adding, take an axe to that block!) |
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Re: Nature Thoguh
(User Rating: 1 )
by Wachumiri on
Saturday, 13th August 2005 @ 11:17:45 AM AEST
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Awesome. Really good poem to come back with.
Take care.
(Also just resurfacing from cruel writer´s block) |
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Re: Nature Thoguh
(User Rating: 1 )
by mecatpurrson on
Sunday, 22nd June 2008 @ 03:44:32 PM AEST
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| The end of this poem makes it a perfect metaphor. But, even if you hadn't added that last stanza, it would have been a very good poem. I actually felt sorry for that poor gallant tree. |
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