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In The Rain
Contributed by
sprinter27
on
Saturday, 11th June 2005 @ 08:50:15 PM in AEST
Topic:
DarkPoetry
|
I’m in the rain
Screaming in pain
Shut out of your life
Struggling this strife
Locked out
Now, full of doubt
In the cold rain
Beginning to drain
Living in anger
Meeting strangers
Because you left me here
Left me to shed tears
Left me in the cold
To grow old
I hate this
I can’t live with it
I feel no arms
I see no one
You used to hug me tight
And say it would be all right
But you lied
And left me to cry
But you can’t see the tears
Not with the rain that wears
Me out and flows down my face
I’m stuck in this place
Can’t run, can’t hide
Can only wish to die
I’m stuck out here
With the tears
That you don’t see
Because the rain flows off of me
Left in the cold rain
Screaming out in pain
Copyright ©
sprinter27
... [
2005-06-11 20:50:15]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: In The Rain
(User Rating: 1 )
by starry_eyed_soul on
Saturday, 11th June 2005 @ 10:16:10 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
| thats great... i really liked it... it flowed really well too.. |
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Re: In The Rain
(User Rating: 1 )
by Man_On_High on
Sunday, 12th June 2005 @ 08:40:49 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
i love the simplicity of each line..
no frills or added words..
great flow-
and the whole premise of rain....awesome
"But you can’t see the tears
Not with the rain that wears
Me out and flows down my face
I’m stuck in this place"
very very well written
5 stars from me..
M.O.H. |
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Re: In The Rain
(User Rating: 1 )
by Dorkfish on
Tuesday, 21st June 2005 @ 06:46:16 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
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| Very good! I liked that! |
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Re: In The Rain
(User Rating: 1 )
by spazz911 on
Wednesday, 29th June 2005 @ 10:48:29 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
great flow and rythmn, u r an excellent writer and never never give up
kc |
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