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Shallow
Contributed by
brittaney
on
Sunday, 5th June 2005 @ 07:33:19 PM in AEST
Topic:
Lifepoems
|
Why can't I tell,
Who loves me for me?
For what is inside,
And not able to see?
Why do most guys,
Like only "pretty" girls?
Who really are nothing,
But a few pearls?
I wish I could know,
When someone is true.
Dosen't want your body,
But just wants you.
Dosent care what I look like,
Don't care what I wear.
They look at my eyes,
Instead of my knotty hair.
They think I look best,
Wearing old ragged jeans.
Personality is something,
And looks are not beans.
So when God is ready,
He'll send someone for me.
I'll be right here waiting,
Ready to see!
Copyright ©
brittaney
... [
2005-06-05 19:33:19]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Shallow
(User Rating: 1 )
by iodinelove on
Sunday, 5th June 2005 @ 07:40:52 PM AEST
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a Message)
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I like it. It's got a nice little rhythm. Keep writing. Even when you have nothing to write about; ecspecially when you have nothing to write about! Stay in the preset forms if you'd like, or spread your wings a bit. Eventually you'll find that you'll have your own style and you can build on that and build on that until it redefines itself and becomes yet another style. Evolution! It takes a lot of work a lot of headaches a lot of anger sometimes too, but it's well worth it ^_^
always, abraham |
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Re: Shallow
(User Rating: 1 )
by sprinter27 on
Sunday, 5th June 2005 @ 08:06:25 PM AEST
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a Message)
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this is good. and hell i could've wrote it if i wasn't so down on myself. lol. oh well, i'm a dark writer i guess. but you basically described me there. good work and i hope he comes to you soon!
~sprints
p.s. keep up the good work!! |
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Re: Shallow
(User Rating: 1 )
by Unbreakable on
Sunday, 5th June 2005 @ 08:26:13 PM AEST
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Another very good write! And don't worry, you're young, you have lots of time to find the right guy!
kRYSTAL |
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Re: Shallow
(User Rating: 1 )
by Stellar on
Sunday, 5th June 2005 @ 08:42:06 PM AEST
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a Message)
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This is good. Stay positive because God will send that someone when it's the right time.
Until then, focus on living your life to the fullest so that you'll be ready for that other person when they do happen to come along.
Keep writing and welcome!
Stellar |
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Re: Shallow
(User Rating: 1 )
by Whisper on
Sunday, 5th June 2005 @ 09:40:13 PM AEST
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Nice write. I think it tells what we have all questioned/asked when were young. Keep the faith ,Thanks for sharing.
Whisper |
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Re: Shallow
(User Rating: 1 )
by In_a_while on
Monday, 6th June 2005 @ 02:18:58 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| Very honest, well put together and full of what's you... it's all that a good poem needs!! Great write and welcome to the site!! dw |
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