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Love's my drowning troubles
Contributed by
In_a_While
on
Thursday, 2nd June 2005 @ 12:27:04 PM in AEST
Topic:
LostLove
|
i keep sinking in this lake
all black and blue is love
no breath is left to take
no brush to paint the blood
i kick and scream the bubbles
i'm not trying to inhale
because love's my drowning troubles
oh this love i'd like to bail...
so i swim to darker bays
where i can be the depth
floating among the days
dying love's a final breath
so i thrash towards her light
kicking to be the free
the bird that flaps in flight
is love becoming me?
dw
Copyright ©
In_a_While
... [
2005-06-02 12:27:04]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Love's my drowning troubles
(User Rating: 1 )
by hauntedscorp on
Thursday, 2nd June 2005 @ 01:07:21 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Wow this poem has a real haunting quality to it...Beautiful in its ruggedness, yet dark...
Well spoken.
Scorp. |
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Re: Love's my drowning troubles
(User Rating: 1 )
by sride686 on
Thursday, 2nd June 2005 @ 01:32:47 PM AEST
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| Things have been busy over here in Iraq so I don’t have much time to read or comment so I say sorry DW. I’m glad to see your writing strong with no writers block. This was a good write of lost love and it has your great style to it. Another well written write filled with deep emotions. Take care my friend and keep your head up….Steve |
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Re: Love's my drowning troubles
(User Rating: 1 )
by Jackee_line on
Thursday, 2nd June 2005 @ 03:09:53 PM AEST
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| well done |
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Re: Love's my drowning troubles
(User Rating: 1 )
by Man_On_High on
Thursday, 2nd June 2005 @ 06:21:52 PM AEST
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I've been there my friend..
this was an awesome write in that it flowed from sad to dark and perhaps back again..
either way...I loved it
great write here
B
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Re: Love's my drowning troubles
(User Rating: 1 )
by Willofree on
Friday, 3rd June 2005 @ 10:14:26 AM AEST
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I like the flow of this poem, and the use of the drowning metaphor. Sometimes with love we are in over our heads.....sorry, I couldn't resist the pun. :)
Well done
Will |
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