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I Cannot Be Me

Contributed by Essentially9 on Tuesday, 24th May 2005 @ 08:11:47 PM in AEST
Topic: anguished



I Cannot Be Me

A tear escapes my eye
To shimmer in the light.
It is my envy
Of what I cannot be.

The blood drowns me
Ever so slowly,
And I have not a care
For life wasn't there

To save me from myself
And what I felt.
Death didn't try to save
The life that I wanted to take;

So I try to be what I envy
Without the one I can never be.




Copyright © Essentially9 ... [ 2005-05-24 20:11:47]
(Date/Time posted on site)





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Re: I Cannot Be Me (User Rating: 1 )
by ForeverAlone on Tuesday, 24th May 2005 @ 08:19:44 PM AEST
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Nice jen, im not really in the mood to read poetry at all, but hey your stuff is always so up bringing and happy sounding, it just makes me so happy, mmhmm, anyways jen, good right as normal, sorry about the sarcastic remarks....good luck lil sis..as always

~Clark


Re: I Cannot Be Me (User Rating: 1 )
by Man_On_High on Tuesday, 24th May 2005 @ 08:29:50 PM AEST
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nice job ..
good flow..



M.O.H.


Re: I Cannot Be Me (User Rating: 1 )
by DorianChambers on Tuesday, 24th May 2005 @ 09:52:14 PM AEST
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If i didn't read this poem the tittle alone would

captivate, i mean can i relate 2 this or what?

oh can i relate, and as always, so intence, so

much u, splendid peice . . .

Dorian Chambers


Re: I Cannot Be Me (User Rating: 1 )
by MorningDove on Tuesday, 24th May 2005 @ 09:53:05 PM AEST
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Jenn, the write is good. But I don't understand it. We can be whatever we choose to be. We have the free will to do so. You just have to want it bad enough.

Smile girl, it could always be worse.

Rita


Re: I Cannot Be Me (User Rating: 1 )
by hauntedscorp on Tuesday, 24th May 2005 @ 10:13:51 PM AEST
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I found this to be a powerful write...Being able to speak such volumes of emotion in so few words is a rare find indeed. Well done.
Scorp.


Re: I Cannot Be Me (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Tuesday, 24th May 2005 @ 10:33:01 PM AEST
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AMAZING as always...


Re: I Cannot Be Me (User Rating: 1 )
by Vampirequeen on Wednesday, 25th May 2005 @ 01:30:42 AM AEST
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Amazing is right.
awsome


Re: I Cannot Be Me (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Wednesday, 25th May 2005 @ 01:23:47 PM AEST
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OK You!
This is VERY good!
But Jenn..(shakes finger) I think you can do even better! You raised the bar, now no more settling for just very good!!!!

The sadness and despair is quite evident and Felt in this piece..(you are always so good at that)
But it also smacks at feeling sorry for yourself, like Rita implies, I think you are better than that.


Re: I Cannot Be Me (User Rating: 1 )
by lovingcritters on Friday, 27th May 2005 @ 10:14:35 PM AEST
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Dear Jen,
'tis so hard to judge another unless you have walked in their shoes, and even then,
you aren't them, so it's absolutely impossible to judge another!
I feel the futility in your poem, and I know you are deeply troubled, but chin up dear, I have faith in you......I know you will figure it out in your due time.
Warm love
consue


Re: I Cannot Be Me (User Rating: 1 )
by xXcrossedXx on Wednesday, 15th June 2005 @ 08:39:15 AM AEST
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Great write I liked the metaphor, not your best but I like it anyway :)
Awesome write.

--amanda--


Re: I Cannot Be Me (User Rating: 1 )
by JamesStockdale on Sunday, 30th August 2020 @ 11:32:30 PM AEST
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Very sad.....




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