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Riley
Contributed by
jjones12
on
Tuesday, 17th May 2005 @ 09:42:28 PM in AEST
Topic:
LovePoetry
|
we are growing further apart,
i wish we were closer,
my heart is breaking,
i want us to be together,
but it's not working,
i don't want to break it off,
but i've got to,
you were everything and more,
i'll never forget you,
this is the hardest thing i've ever had to do,
i'm going to miss you
Copyright ©
jjones12
... [
2005-05-17 21:42:28]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Riley
(User Rating: 1 )
by poet70 on
Tuesday, 17th May 2005 @ 10:31:30 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
| I think it was ok, pretty simple however, it almost seems like it is missing something, that is my comment, keep writing, it doesn't mean it is bad, I just feel it is missing a little something, some or I should say MANY of my poems have that problem. so don't feel bad ok? Good luck on your others. |
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Re: Riley
(User Rating: 1 )
by europeanprincess on
Saturday, 2nd September 2006 @ 10:42:10 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| it is short, but you wanted to write down what you felt and that is good. this sounds like a break up and i am very sorry if it was. maybe the next one you write will be about not missing but loving |
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