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Crimson Thoughts
Contributed by
bobotheclown
on
Tuesday, 17th May 2005 @ 12:47:56 AM in AEST
Topic:
EmotionalPoetry
|
Pushed these thoughts away
For what can my heart comprehend?
A beaten fragment of stability
Is all that remains
Even though a mask of strength
Is what rises to the surface
This emptiness beckons
And these scars are calloused
I check these tears
I have not cried in so long
A bitter picture, a fading memory
As the organs final notes fade away
The terrible quiet whispers in
Torment holds me in lock jaw
And Silence is all that remains
Saturating with her heady presence
She seduces with promises of contentment
Her lies well practiced and honeyed
My skin is open for the cut
Eyes closed in immeasurable bliss
The beautiful knife glints in the sunlight
Temporarily blinded by the spell
I can't wipe the gauze from my eyes
And I will wait eternity for the end
Copyright ©
bobotheclown
... [
2005-05-17 00:47:56]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Crimson Thoughts
(User Rating: 1 )
by secretwind on
Tuesday, 17th May 2005 @ 01:40:22 AM AEST
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a Message)
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Deep Flow
I can feel thee emotional torture in this write.
Well Done. |
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Re: Crimson Thoughts
(User Rating: 1 )
by Jenni_K on
Tuesday, 17th May 2005 @ 06:15:48 AM AEST
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Joel.....I am just a click away....if you need to talk. You are doing great.... Hang in there, my little friend..
Hugs
Jenni |
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Re: Crimson Thoughts
(User Rating: 1 )
by blowfish_jane on
Tuesday, 17th May 2005 @ 08:58:01 AM AEST
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Joel, this was just powerful and emotive.
your doing good Joel and were proud on your accomplishment.
Hugs,
Jane xxx |
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Re: Crimson Thoughts
(User Rating: 1 )
by FleurdeSang on
Tuesday, 17th May 2005 @ 03:20:00 PM AEST
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a Message)
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*BIG HUGGLES FOR JOEL!!*
My dear friend.... oh, mon cheri Joel... My heart cries out to help you, guide you to light, restore hope into your yearning soul... Don't end it, cheri... don't end your life... There is so much more for you out there... Yes, there will be days that pain and misery is all that you see in the future... But, know always, that oyu have friends here, and I am always a PM/IM away, whenever you need me. Intense, heart-breaking, tear-jerking, flawless piece, my friend... Morbid, gorgeous and horrifying images... How I wish to help you, my friend... You know where I am, cheri. I'm always here for you. *hugs and comfort for Joel* Hope you feel better soon, sweetie. All my love!!! Forever,
Your dear and concerned friend,
Stephy!! |
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Re: Crimson Thoughts
(User Rating: 1 )
by waos on
Thursday, 19th May 2005 @ 08:59:56 PM AEST
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a Message)
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I'm really tired or this would be a more intelligent comment... I do know
that this was really good, and that I know how you feel. My 6 months is on
Saturday... I don't feel proud really at all.
You ended this one really well... the whole "can't wipe the gauze from my eyes"
idea...that was amazing. And the line after it as well.
~Kara |
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Re: Crimson Thoughts
(User Rating: 1 )
by Essentially9 on
Wednesday, 25th May 2005 @ 11:10:32 PM AEST
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| i definantly felt this piece. i never have been a cutter, but i have always felt those emotions and have been tempted to start when i reach that point where nothing matters anymore. as for the piece itself, it was of course written to where the reader could feel it. your ending was nicely done. dont believe in promises, or lies, but believe in what can be.... |
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Re: Crimson Thoughts
(User Rating: 1 )
by emphaticplacebo on
Tuesday, 30th August 2005 @ 05:35:13 AM AEST
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a Message)
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Another great write Joel! I could really find depth and torment in your words. Very well written and bursting with description. You have an awesome talent and I look forward to reading more
Dan |
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Re: Crimson Thoughts
(User Rating: 1 )
by Broken-Suicide on
Sunday, 26th February 2006 @ 01:46:29 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| Very well written. How are you doing |
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