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Full Of Emptiness
Contributed by
Willofree
on
Monday, 16th May 2005 @ 04:12:16 PM in AEST
Topic:
LostLove
|
When you deserted me, something died inside
A retching pain where fulfillment used to reside
Although I wail and bemoan my loss
It seems definite you're not cognizant of the cost
Tears etch their trail down my cheek
Carving a path that epitomizes the bleak
A heart broken state of mind
For peace and happiness I no longer find
I can't eat or sleep anymore
All I do is pace the floor
I fantasize about how wonderful it could have been
I doubt my capacity to ever experience those feelings again
I feel stuffed and bloated inside
Too full of grief for anything else to imbibe
It's as if a surgeon, my stomach had removed
What duration of time can I survive without food
The monumental void I have only you can fill
With your desertion from my life, I have no purpose or will
Now that, as a couple, we have severed our connection
Nothing seems to interest me without that affection
I have been depressed and demoralized
But life treks onward I realize
Time does heal and soften the blow
But when can I commence eating again until I'm full, I don't know
Copyright ©
Willofree
... [
2005-05-16 16:12:16] (Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Full Of Emptiness
(User Rating: 1 ) by Jenni_K on
Monday, 16th May 2005 @ 04:17:55 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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Wow!! Such a clear picture of lost love.... This was really well done!!
I am sorry if this really happened to you..and if it didn't, then you are a whiz!!!
Jenni |
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Re: Full Of Emptiness
(User Rating: 1 ) by Essentially9 on
Monday, 16th May 2005 @ 08:16:16 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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will, this was quite a poem. very impressive. i dont read much love poetry, but i was drawn into reading it because none of the poems ive seen by you have been the least bit under amazing every time. your have great rhymes and meaning. your style is exceptional, and the fact that you tell a story while being vague in some parts to leave something to the imagination. very well done indeed, though you should already know this =] |
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Re: Full Of Emptiness
(User Rating: 1 ) by Former_Member on
Friday, 27th May 2005 @ 04:20:57 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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Interesting metaphorical poem. The last stanza is especially interesting. Nice work! J. |
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Re: Full Of Emptiness
(User Rating: 1 ) by hauntedscorp on
Sunday, 3rd July 2005 @ 01:08:20 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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Excellent write Will!! You displayed your heartbroken emotions so well in this piece...It had a great flow, and rhymed well, and you certainly conveyed the empty feeling that we can all relate to so well, after we lose a love...Nicely done, and I hope things have improved since this write. If I remember correctly, you have written of a new love lately...In due time you'll feel that wonderful, fulfilling feeling again with a special someone...
Scorp. |
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