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Sounds of September
Contributed by
blue_angel
on
Thursday, 5th May 2005 @ 08:10:22 PM in AEST
Topic:
DarkPoetry
|
ive given up slowly
for as long as i can remember
ive been hurting deeply
since the sounds of cold september
since the leaves of red and crimson
formed a carpet on the ground
since then i have felt all remorse
in this pain i've found
in my head visions of death
take in my hand a blistering knife
and with this cursed sharp blade
i will thus end my life
not again will i feel
nor will i remember
the pain and guilt and trepidation
the sounds of cold september
Copyright ©
blue_angel
... [
2005-05-05 20:10:22]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Sounds of September
(User Rating: 1 )
by dreamer_for_eternity on
Thursday, 5th May 2005 @ 08:18:19 PM AEST
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a Message)
|
| This is dark, but it is very good, too... it really holds a lot of meaning and emotion and I can tell you really put your heart into this one! Good write, and thanks for posting this! |
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Re: Sounds of September
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Thursday, 5th May 2005 @ 08:22:45 PM AEST
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a Message)
|
the imagery in this was excellently done. This is dark, and a little sad, but really well written. Very nice job.
klia |
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Re: Sounds of September
(User Rating: 1 )
by pUnKa_RaCh on
Thursday, 5th May 2005 @ 08:42:28 PM AEST
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a Message)
|
REMARKABLE!! what moving poetry
very heart-wrenching and pain-filled. just beautiful tho, ur words captured me
well done and i feel this way also
lovely poem i reeli enjoyed it |
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Re: Sounds of September
(User Rating: 1 )
by hauntedscorp on
Thursday, 5th May 2005 @ 08:57:46 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| Haunting...beautiful description...I really like this. Scorp. |
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Re: Sounds of September
(User Rating: 1 )
by Jaycee on
Thursday, 5th May 2005 @ 09:31:50 PM AEST
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a Message)
|
| This poem just flows like clear brook water over smooth stone, it just flows. Not anything even approaching forced rhyme, just beautiful rhythm, sweet. The emotion is clear, well stated and the visuals are crisp and vivid. The pain is clear, too, like a long fatigue that just won't go away and the person in the poem just wants rest. Very well done. |
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Re: Sounds of September
(User Rating: 1 )
by Djarven on
Friday, 6th May 2005 @ 12:55:34 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| Great writing, I like your work... |
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Re: Sounds of September
(User Rating: 1 )
by sride686 on
Friday, 6th May 2005 @ 02:16:41 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| This is another good write and I really enjoy all your work. Keep up the great writes you put so much emotion into this write and it had a dark ending. Good job and take care….Steve |
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Re: Sounds of September
(User Rating: 1 )
by Fionndruinne on
Monday, 9th May 2005 @ 08:53:08 PM AEST
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a Message)
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A touch of beauty and poeticism to what is otherwise a dark and anything-but-beautiful thing. You've done well here. But I hope you do not personally know such darkness, or if you do, that you will find Light.
Take care.
Andrew |
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