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the candle
Contributed by
blue_angel
on
Tuesday, 3rd May 2005 @ 10:39:48 AM in AEST
Topic:
DarkPoetry
|
i see the candle
the flame burning so high
slowly melting away
licking my fingers
the fire burns my skin
slowly burning away
piles of wax
collect at my feet
slowly dripping away
the wick becomes shorter
the flame burns much hotter
slowly fading away
i see the candle
i hold the flame in my hands
slowly melting away...
Copyright ©
blue_angel
... [
2005-05-03 10:39:48]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: the candle
(User Rating: 1 )
by Whisper on
Tuesday, 3rd May 2005 @ 12:37:28 PM AEST
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Interesting write. I took it to mean Life and the ever melting layers -as in the passage of time/years. The piles at your feet were memories and you hands held the wick wishing for more.
Whisper |
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Re: the candle
(User Rating: 1 )
by sride686 on
Tuesday, 3rd May 2005 @ 02:55:00 PM AEST
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| This is a very different write but good. You have such a imagination for voicing emotions and its good to read a different style of writing. Keep up the writes and I’ll keep reading take care…..Steve |
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Re: the candle
(User Rating: 1 )
by Jaycee on
Friday, 6th May 2005 @ 09:50:28 PM AEST
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Like whisper, I see this as a life theme, but the impression I get is more of an exhaustion of life rather than a living of it. Like the events of life are like oxygen that leech the life of candle, causing it to burn. i know you use the word slowly throughout the poem, but the poem conveys a quickening of pace regardless of the slowlys. Like "the wick becomes shorter, the flame burns much hotter" - this conveys (in my mind) the nearing of the end of life. i don't think we are talking natural causes for a healthy 15 year old.
now that i read your poem again, a different thought occurs to me. maybe this is symbolic of the pain melting away and the flame that is jennie is burning through. writing this now, after having the context of poems that came later, helps with the hindsight. you call it prestigious which wouldn't fit with my 1st interpretation. i'll defibitely go with this new, more life affirming interpretation. let the flame burn brightly and let nothing extinguish it. you rock, jennie |
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