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Promised Love

Contributed by Essentially9 on Sunday, 1st May 2005 @ 08:16:47 PM in AEST
Topic: oops



Promised Love

The blood trickles down
The white flower petals
To encrimson the ground.

I exist only as a memory
That's easily forgotten,
And that's all I'll ever be.

Life's redundant and doesn't last,
And even death is worth living for
With happiness only in the past.

You say I'll always be here for you,
And I know that's a lie you promise,
Because it's never before been true.

The only truth is that everything
That brings me down is always
Going to be with me for eternity,

And the flower blooms red
With the broken promise
Cutting the petals to shreds

With truth as serrated as the lie.




Copyright © Essentially9 ... [ 2005-05-01 20:16:47]
(Date/Time posted on site)





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Re: Promised Love (User Rating: 1 )
by ForeverAlone on Sunday, 1st May 2005 @ 08:20:49 PM AEST
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Nice jen...but is Nice the right word to describe.....eh....Amazment....but thats always..and it is just my thoughts put to a poem..Great job jen=]

Clark


Re: Promised Love (User Rating: 1 )
by emystar on Sunday, 1st May 2005 @ 10:05:35 PM AEST
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Sad but written well.
huggs,
emy


Re: Promised Love (User Rating: 1 )
by Vampirequeen on Monday, 2nd May 2005 @ 12:18:27 AM AEST
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Nice very nice i love reading your poems.
awsome job.


Re: Promised Love (User Rating: 1 )
by DorianChambers on Monday, 2nd May 2005 @ 12:36:19 AM AEST
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Such a meaningful peace of poetry each word hurting a little more than the last . . .

Dorian Chambers


Re: Promised Love (User Rating: 1 )
by venkat on Monday, 2nd May 2005 @ 01:51:46 AM AEST
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"only truth is that...brings me down..going to be with me to eternity"..such a feeling of sadness is continued in many poems.beautiful flowers are stated to be covered with blood only to remain as shreds.. Brilliant work.
:-) venkat


Re: Promised Love (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Tuesday, 3rd May 2005 @ 03:29:12 PM AEST
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Uh Huumm!
Well look who's growing now!
This piece makes me feel like you took a step back to write it and in doing so took two forward.
Awsome work Jenn!


Re: Promised Love (User Rating: 1 )
by fielding88 on Wednesday, 4th May 2005 @ 07:16:20 PM AEST
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Lol....I'm sorry, I've got to laugh here. I find myself laughing now. How in the heck do you make up ALL these amazing conclusions! JEEZ! lol, sorry, I had to get that off my chest :P This was really one of the best phrases/conclusions I've ever seen from you. I've been reading a couple of your writes in one sitting, and so it's great to see all these conclusions one after the other in succession, and by the time I finished this one I was just floored, I couldnt help but laugh at how impossible it seems, but you pull it off just SO well! I completely ignored the reast of the poem in stating how much I liked the conclusion, but it was really quite good. Lol, no pressure intended, but you always seem to impress with your endings and poems in general, and that's something that comes just so naturally, you'd actually have to work harder at not living up to any sort of ideas I have in my mind for your poetry than just naturally living up to them. Great stuff!


Re: Promised Love (User Rating: 1 )
by lostinmyself on Friday, 6th May 2005 @ 01:15:59 PM AEST
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This is my favourite.
Out of all your poems I have read, this is the one I love the most.
(But then, I have a weakness.. I love petals in poems. lol)

I love this, there is so much in it that I love.

Great write my friend, I know I will be back to see this one again.

*hugs* Phil xxx


Re: Promised Love (User Rating: 1 )
by blowfish_jane on Thursday, 2nd June 2005 @ 02:21:19 AM AEST
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Jen, what can i say? You rock as a poet as a writer and as a commenter.

No stop doing that or i'll tell Amy.

Jane xx


Re: Promised Love (User Rating: 1 )
by hauntedscorp on Tuesday, 4th October 2005 @ 03:00:36 AM AEST
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Awesome ending Jen!! Profound write with heartfelt emotions, and sheer honesty. Well done.


Scorp.




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