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Walk With the Dead
Contributed by
blue_angel
on
Wednesday, 27th April 2005 @ 10:16:34 PM in AEST
Topic:
DarkPoetry
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Im giving up
Im giving in
Don’t give a ****
For I have sinned
Cuts too deep
Send thrills down my spine
See the blood seep
Escape from my shrine
Tonight I am reborn
But still cold inside
Finger pricked on a thorn
But the wound I will hide
Hidden by the dark side of the moon
I walk among the dead tonight
To return again to my grave too soon
Back to the darkness, away from the light…
Copyright ©
blue_angel
... [
2005-04-27 22:16:34] (Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Walk With the Dead
(User Rating: 1 ) by TheVoice on
Wednesday, 27th April 2005 @ 10:25:12 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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I enjoyed this. Great piece.
The Voice
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Re: Walk With the Dead
(User Rating: 1 ) by Jaycee on
Wednesday, 27th April 2005 @ 10:56:04 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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Very nice use of rhyme and meter, it flows in a different but pleasant way. The poem has excellent imagery. I can imagine visually everything going on in the poem (except for the part about sinning; keep that up and I will stuff a brownie in your mouth); you don't create mere words, you create tapestries of somber emotion.
Another great poem
Jaycee |
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Re: Walk With the Dead
(User Rating: 1 ) by Former_Member on
Wednesday, 27th April 2005 @ 11:04:26 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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it almost seems unfinished, but otherwise, very nicely done. the last to lines are good...it just seems like there should be more..though that may just be me. very nice job so far. |
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