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Capital of Corruption ((edit))
Contributed by
eternalnight4x
on
Monday, 25th April 2005 @ 07:54:06 PM in AEST
Topic:
DarkPoetry
|
Sullied earth tainted with claret betrayal
From the savage slaughter amongst sinful beasts
A land of corruption, treason and sin
Give birth to creatures of aberrant ways
Verboten love and sinful pleasures
Lustful minds merged with murderous feats
To live by their own perverse desires
Weak humans are tempt into this abyss
Ravage the restraint placed upon them at birth
Destroying the boundary line that God had preached
Humans restrained by such trivial traits
Gender, class, preconceptions and morals
Once sane beings they lived proper lives
Until corruption finally thrived
Deranged creatures is what they truly are
True aspirations are finally revealed
The women with women, and the men with men
Brothers with sisters, and parents with children
Slaughtering and stealing by their own free will
Till the remnants of sin is what remains
Copyright ©
eternalnight4x
... [
2005-04-25 19:54:06] (Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Capital of Corruption ((edit))
(User Rating: 1 ) by Former_Member on
Tuesday, 26th April 2005 @ 03:18:20 AM AEST (User
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“Sullied earth tainted with claret betrayal”
-Excellent use of imagery and symbolism
“From the savage slaughter amongst sinful beasts”
-Well expressed alliteration
“A land of corruption, treason and sin
Give birth to creatures of aberrant ways”
-Effective and well articulated personification
“Verboten love and sinful pleasures
Lustful minds merged with murderous feats”
-Eloquent and symbolical.
“To live by their own perverse desires
Weak humans are tempt into this abyss”
-I could not help but smile, when I came across this… It felt much like something I had written, not that long ago…
I feel that we are on the same page!
I couldn’t agree more with you, in regards to this statement.
Many of your concepts seem to overlap with the same concepts in some of your other poems, I, too share that trait and find it difficult to stimulate ideas. Despite this, we are consistent with our works, which isn’t such a bad thing?
I really do enjoy reading your works and look forward to more,
Many more!
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