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Jill

Contributed by Jaycee on Tuesday, 12th April 2005 @ 11:27:00 AM in AEST
Topic: SadPoetry



The torrent overwhelmed me
as I swallowed some more
salt stung eyes
told me was miles to shore

Was never gonna make it
I had nothing left
of strength and endurance
I was truly bereft

The sun cracked through cover
casting shadows on the hill
at the sandy pile's top
was the brunette, was Jill

Strength reanimated these limbs
so worn from disuse
Paddled feverishly I did
toward my salvation, my muse

Each motion an ordeal
resisting the enemies' attack
But I was committed
I could - would - never go back

Like the Goddess Athena
she stood on her shore
Collapsing at her feet
I needed nothing more

She sat down beside me
Her wisdom flowing like wine
My fears scattered before her
Her land was benign

Life was finally good
with Her at my side
Could not recall
the last time I cried

We walked to the heights
of her sandy domain
I was refreshed, renewed
Iaughing gleefully in the rain

Time lost all meaning
as I basked in her aura
But the ground shook beneath
me much to my horror

My work here is done
she said with sad smile
Winging aloft she was gone
I wondered at her guile

Running through the jungle
my arms ripped with slashes
the signal fire died out
as did I too, to ashes...




Copyright © Jaycee ... [ 2005-04-12 11:27:00]
(Date/Time posted on site)





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Re: Jill (User Rating: 1 )
by blue_angel on Tuesday, 12th April 2005 @ 07:42:27 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)
"Strength reanimated these limbs
so worn from disuse
Paddled feverishly I did
toward my salvation, my muse"

omigosh yer an amazing writer. those words... the whole thing... just amazing. totally swept away. sad, yet refreshing at the same time. its so perfect... u have such talent. i like
"My work here is done
she said with sad smile
Winging aloft she was gone
I wondered at her guile"
its so sad but its so well written... great job! me wants more! keep writing!
luv n hugs
jennie*


Re: Jill (User Rating: 1 )
by Jenni_K on Thursday, 12th May 2005 @ 07:25:13 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)
I absolutely loved this one....the imagery was great!! Well written, JC...
Jenni


Re: Jill (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Wednesday, 21st February 2007 @ 08:52:58 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)
This was a great poem. i could feel the emotions in this poem

Oh by theway, my name is Jill.... LOL!

Great write!




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