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Be Longing
Contributed by
Nazmythian
on
Friday, 1st April 2005 @ 07:31:47 PM in AEST
Topic:
LostLove
|
_________________________________
Reaching out through time and space
Beyond their veil I see your face
Moving lips produce no sound
But as was then, so too is now
I read the meaning in your eyes
I must return, it's not my time
The road before me changes fast
Again you're taken from my grasp
To soon it seems we're pulled apart
Weight added to my heavy heart
So wait I will, as preordained
Till past is present, future changed
_________________________________
Copyright ©
Nazmythian
... [
2005-04-01 19:31:47]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Be Longing
(User Rating: 1 )
by the_Ghost_Moth on
Friday, 1st April 2005 @ 07:54:53 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Nice work, Nazzy.
--Ghosty |
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Re: Be Longing
(User Rating: 1 )
by PhantomVampyress on
Saturday, 2nd April 2005 @ 01:07:33 AM AEST
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wow this is really good.. I can totally relate to this.. awesome !!
JENNI |
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Re: Be Longing
(User Rating: 1 )
by Whisper on
Saturday, 2nd April 2005 @ 02:59:15 AM AEST
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Nice write Nazm . I enjoyed that.
Whisper |
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Re: Be Longing
(User Rating: 1 )
by Kie on
Saturday, 2nd April 2005 @ 07:04:47 AM AEST
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a Message)
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Your rhyming and flow was truly perfect.
A joy to read and beautifully composed.
Kie |
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Re: Be Longing
(User Rating: 1 )
by lostinmyself on
Saturday, 2nd April 2005 @ 07:54:14 AM AEST
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I love this.. it says a lot in few words.
It is very sad... but there is hope behind it, too.
I wouldn't change anything.. it really does seen to be complete.
Great write,
Phil |
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Re: Be Longing
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Saturday, 2nd April 2005 @ 09:09:59 AM AEST
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Yes, I like it as it is.
Lovely flow and rhyme.
But more than that it speaks volumes to the heart and soul, creates a longing for what should be right and leaves one feeling sad but not without hope. |
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Re: Be Longing
(User Rating: 1 )
by blowfish_jane on
Saturday, 2nd April 2005 @ 09:22:57 AM AEST
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Naz this was outstanding, the flow, the ryming, the imagery was perfect.
You're an incredible writer, well done on this one.
Jane |
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Re: Be Longing
(User Rating: 1 )
by pixie on
Saturday, 2nd April 2005 @ 11:13:29 AM AEST
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amazing write Nazzy.so deep and meaningful
pix xx |
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Re: Be Longing
(User Rating: 1 )
by freckle on
Saturday, 2nd April 2005 @ 11:45:39 AM AEST
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I likey! Short and very impressive.....great work Naz!
Carol |
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Re: Be Longing
(User Rating: 1 )
by Vampirequeen on
Saturday, 2nd April 2005 @ 02:04:17 PM AEST
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Awww so sad and sweet.
an awsome write Nazzy. |
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Re: Be Longing
(User Rating: 1 )
by bobotheclown on
Saturday, 2nd April 2005 @ 10:07:05 PM AEST
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Yeah I can relate to this and it definitely does
hurt when someone we love (or think we
love) is taken from us. Kind of short, but I
agree that it seems complete. Really good
poem Naz.
Bobo (Joel) |
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Re: Be Longing
(User Rating: 1 )
by Red_October on
Wednesday, 6th April 2005 @ 02:48:58 PM AEST
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| This is good...gave me chills. It needs nothing more. I enjoyed this muchly. Tiffany J. (Red_October) |
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Re: Be Longing
(User Rating: 1 )
by FleurdeSang on
Wednesday, 6th April 2005 @ 09:59:28 PM AEST
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Ah, a bittersweet melody to the heart and soul, cheri Nazzy. Lost love, lost heart, yet... there seems to be a touch of hope... understandable, for hope is eternal, even if it's flame withers a little... Words from a wise friend. I hope that all will pass, your love will return, maybe not as the same form, but return nonetheless. Exquisite piece, dripping with heart-felt emotion... just... absolutely flawless. Always a pleasure reading your work, cheri... And thank you for always commenting so beautifully on mine, I really appreciate it, mon ami. All my love and comfort. I'm a Mm away if you need me. =) Forever,
Your dear friend,
Stephy!! *hugs and love* |
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Re: Be Longing
(User Rating: 1 )
by Willofree on
Friday, 8th April 2005 @ 05:21:35 PM AEST
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Naz,
This seems very romantic, along with some sadness. It seems a message of the right person at the wrong time. A very good flow and another rather unique style. I don't think anyone could stereotype your style, as it is always changing and evolving. It does feel done.
Another great write
Wil, Terry |
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