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No Second Takes
Contributed by
greyshadow
on
Wednesday, 30th March 2005 @ 04:37:36 AM in AEST
Topic:
schoolproblems
|
Here at this university
I star in my own movie
Without a script
The plot is blurry
My lines change every day
Never the same
I forgot the title
But the tickets are free
Its showing every day all week
No previews to see
If you want a part
There's no auditions
No casting calls
I don't do second takes
Or reality spinoffs
But you can't be fake
We don't usually practice
Curtains open every weekend
But I'll be live all week
Bring your own props
Whatever you need
We wont be taping
You can recored each scene in your memoy
Sometimes I use a camera
To capture and freeze
All the stars of this university
Copyright ©
greyshadow
... [
2005-03-30 04:37:36]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: No Second Takes
(User Rating: 1 )
by inoc on
Wednesday, 30th March 2005 @ 05:13:33 AM AEST
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a Message)
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I liked what you wrote....one day my daughters may be in a University too and it's nice to read your poem
cheers!~ |
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Re: No Second Takes
(User Rating: 1 )
by Baronhawk on
Wednesday, 30th March 2005 @ 07:41:26 AM AEST
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a Message)
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Ahh yes nostalgia.....I have always been fond of my uni days and indeed it is like a favourite movie that I would often replay in my sweet echoes of memories...how often I wished I was back in uni again...
Nice write....excellent topic and subject matter...the wonderfull young uni days! You seem to have captured here the image of uni life in a wonderful way..I like your use of the camera and 'movie' as an anology..though the structure of your rhyme and rhythm could be bucked up though...just some technical observation but I may be trying to read it in the wrong fashion...some flow problems...but nicely done!
Just my opinions of course... |
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