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Paper Roses

Contributed by freckle on Sunday, 13th March 2005 @ 10:58:31 PM in AEST
Topic: ambiguous



Paper Roses

Words on paper
Set in motion
Sights and sounds and smells

Feelings bloom like Springtime flowers
Underneath the waning moon

Tender leaves and twisting stalks
heavy flower heads,
sweet and musky
soft and pale
see the flowers bloom

Nighttime fragrance reaches out
touching lovers with a kiss

Morning's dawn reveals the splendor
dainty heads reach through the mist

People travel to and fro
so few take the time to see
"Take the time to smell the roses"
for they bloom for you and me.

Carol




Copyright © freckle ... [ 2005-03-13 22:58:31]
(Date/Time posted on site)





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Re: Paper Roses (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Sunday, 13th March 2005 @ 11:11:09 PM AEST
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This is absolutely gorgeous. Its written to perfection, flows smoothly and is perhaps one of the most beautiful writes I have read in a long while. Thanks for sharing.

Take Care Always
- Becca


Re: Paper Roses (User Rating: 1 )
by tin on Sunday, 13th March 2005 @ 11:12:28 PM AEST
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Wow great poem. it flows quite nicely


Re: Paper Roses (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Monday, 14th March 2005 @ 08:57:04 PM AEST
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Wow, this is stunning!
I agree with the comments above, this write flows smoothly and just so perfectly...
Beautiful word combinations too..
Very vivid pictures portrayed through here!
Great write :D

~kt


Re: Paper Roses (User Rating: 1 )
by DorianChambers on Monday, 14th March 2005 @ 11:10:18 PM AEST
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very nice carol, softly treading from the heart . . .

Dorian Chambers


Re: Paper Roses (User Rating: 1 )
by the_Ghost_Moth on Tuesday, 15th March 2005 @ 07:13:21 PM AEST
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Aww, Carol.

--Ghosty


Re: Paper Roses (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Saturday, 19th March 2005 @ 02:50:43 PM AEST
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I really wanted the fifth line to end rhyming 'smells'. I think it would have made this piece very special, other than just plain 'special', which is a nice enough accolade in itself, I expect, but . . . I think you get my drift - I really appreciate the rhythm of this piece, it is soft and lulling.

Really fine read, Carol.


Re: Paper Roses (User Rating: 1 )
by blowfish_jane on Monday, 21st March 2005 @ 09:48:27 AM AEST
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Carol this was breathtaking, amazing poem sweetie. Im glad i got to read it.

Hugs,
Jane


Re: Paper Roses (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Tuesday, 22nd March 2005 @ 04:47:25 AM AEST
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Wow...... only statement I can think of.....wow!!!


Re: Paper Roses (User Rating: 1 )
by Nazmythian on Thursday, 24th March 2005 @ 07:37:36 PM AEST
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I tend to agree with Goose ... well and everybody else that chose to comment. Even with En Eff and thought that a rhyme while not essential there ... would have worked nicely.
( maybe ... as petals they soon fell ? )
( but then bloom would seem out of synch )
Never mind Carol ... pay no heed to my rambling. You did fabulous.

Nazzy ~




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