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Echoes In An Empty Room
Contributed by
Silent-No-More
on
Saturday, 12th March 2005 @ 12:59:35 PM in AEST
Topic:
ambiguous
|
She could still see the picture
On the wall where it once hung
The blank space, pulsed
With the recollection of it
[In some ways…
It was still there]
She had folded herself in two
And torn herself wide open
“I danced with our monster, dear”
She howled, as it howled back
[There were echoes
In the room]
Feeling mostly incomplete
And somehow something more
There beneath the florescent lights
An empty wall begged
..for what it had before
Copyright ©
Silent-No-More
... [
2005-03-12 12:59:35]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Echoes In An Empty Room
(User Rating: 1 )
by ladyfawn on
Saturday, 12th March 2005 @ 01:03:10 PM AEST
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this is brilliant, it breathes... hugs n' love nessa
@->>->:- |
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Re: Echoes In An Empty Room
(User Rating: 1 )
by Nazmythian on
Saturday, 12th March 2005 @ 01:14:53 PM AEST
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"How does one comment on something that was born of speechlessness??? "
I think there are times silence is indeed golden and there are times when words need not be said .. basking in the glow of the moment is all that matters ... I choose ... to sit ... and bask in your glow ~
Nazzy ~
( still amazed ) |
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Re: Echoes In An Empty Room
(User Rating: 1 )
by Willofree on
Saturday, 12th March 2005 @ 01:29:33 PM AEST
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Very potent and powerful poem expertly written. It reminds me of a time in my life when I was seperated; and turned all the pidtures against the wall so I didn't have to look at them.
Anyway Superb
Willofree |
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Re: Echoes In An Empty Room
(User Rating: 1 )
by girltranscended on
Saturday, 12th March 2005 @ 01:40:51 PM AEST
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"The blank space, pulsed"
"An empty wall begged"
These lines especially struck me.
*sits, smiles at the talent before her, hears Elvis in the background (thinks of sister's previous obsession), and smiles again.
Great job! |
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Re: Echoes In An Empty Room
(User Rating: 1 )
by imalive_enoughsaid on
Saturday, 12th March 2005 @ 05:04:24 PM AEST
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sometimes there are poems , that are so powerful in very few words , so that it leaves you with nothing to say except ...wow.....
::WOW:: |
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Re: Echoes In An Empty Room
(User Rating: 1 )
by freckle on
Saturday, 12th March 2005 @ 08:43:21 PM AEST
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Oooooh, good one Snemmy....I really liked this!
Carol
(Who wants to hang a picture now!) |
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Re: Echoes In An Empty Room
(User Rating: 1 )
by fielding88 on
Saturday, 12th March 2005 @ 08:56:20 PM AEST
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| such an eerie piece of writing here. this was really excellent. i love the sense of such an empty room having so much life and so many things going on and everything had a purpose. it's hard to explain, but it felt like everything was just so supernatual and....i dunno lol, but it was just so nice to read. I hope u can make heads or tails of this comment, but to sum it up, i really enjoyed it! |
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Re: Echoes In An Empty Room
(User Rating: 1 )
by blowfish_jane on
Sunday, 13th March 2005 @ 02:00:01 AM AEST
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Snemmy this was outstanding, i can't beleive i missed it.
THis was writen so well i was glad i got to read it.
Jane |
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Re: Echoes In An Empty Room
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Monday, 14th March 2005 @ 12:06:29 PM AEST
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Again, you have such a way of laying out layers upon layers. What I love about this is that regardless of its true meaning, there is room for each reader to put something up on that wall.
I bow to your cleverness! |
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Re: Echoes In An Empty Room
(User Rating: 1 )
by Fionndruinne on
Monday, 14th March 2005 @ 04:04:57 PM AEST
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A very simple but sad and powerful piece. Being able to write such things shows the strength of the poet, I think. To try to bring beauty of some sort to the expression of feelings so deep and dark.
Blessings.
Andrew |
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Re: Echoes In An Empty Room
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Monday, 14th March 2005 @ 07:39:48 PM AEST
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The blank space, pulsed
With the recollection of it
[In some ways…
It was still there]
Ahh, now see I loved this - I would so love to have written this because I related in such a personal way. The title was perfect, the write was terrific, and I especially loved those lines above.
You are always great, but I felt a connection to this one somehow.
Thanks for sharing this -
mj
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Re: Echoes In An Empty Room
(User Rating: 1 )
by UnlovedChild on
Friday, 25th March 2005 @ 06:13:08 PM AEST
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| This is a beautifully amazing poem. Excellent job. |
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Re: Echoes In An Empty Room
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Wednesday, 4th May 2005 @ 04:39:58 PM AEST
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I guess I hadn't commented on this before. I know those echos - I still remember an empty house in '75. Eventually pictures go back up, even though different ones perhaps. Anyway, this was wonderfully written as per your usual.
I think the introductory stanza pulls the reader in. |
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Re: Echoes In An Empty Room
(User Rating: 1 )
by secretwind on
Thursday, 12th May 2005 @ 10:30:21 PM AEST
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ahh yes
I like the flow on this
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Re: Echoes In An Empty Room
(User Rating: 1 )
by eternityandaday4u on
Thursday, 2nd June 2005 @ 10:43:18 AM AEST
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| i must say you are a very powerful writter... this poem was brilliant... i enjoyed it... always smile eternity |
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Re: Echoes In An Empty Room
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Tuesday, 13th June 2006 @ 11:31:56 PM AEST
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| You are truly amazing! I love how you take something that can seem so simple and make it sound so uniquely profound. |
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Re: Echoes In An Empty Room
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Tuesday, 13th June 2006 @ 11:34:04 PM AEST
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| Poetically perfect! |
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