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Bleeding Away My Life
Contributed by
Xxluckie_lynnxX
on
Tuesday, 8th March 2005 @ 09:59:55 PM in AEST
Topic:
Suicide
|
Bleeding Away My Life
Im sitting here
Drowning in a puddle of me
Ecstasy runs through me
When the skin tears and blood runs free
I cant stop myself
Though why would I want to ?
Lines taking over my skin
Its something i have to do
My head is screaming
For me to stop
My heart is bursting
Its about to pop
My soul is crying
Black tears are falling
I need to free myself
From the prison in which I'm stalling
Im cutting my soul
Tearing my heat
Torturing my skin
They are all screaming for the blade to fall apart
Im crying tears or sorrow
Regret, anger, and hate
What has my life fallen to ?
Where lies my fate ?
I've turned my back on the world
I've turned all hope down
Now I'm stuck inside a hell
In which my life is bound
My skull cracks as I bang it hard
Sliding down to the floor
Demon voices welcome me as I scream
Hope comes running but I've locked the down
I'm chocking on the opportunities
For me to ever succeed
But my blood is washing my life away
All my hopes flood out , all my dreams
I pressed the blade once again
And finally feel the drugs
My blood and tears run together
Staying like little bugs
I know this is the end, but I'll cut some more
Until I feel satisfied
Devil hands pull me down
As I say to my life "Good Bye."
Copyright ©
Xxluckie_lynnxX
... [
2005-03-08 21:59:55]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Bleeding Away My Life
(User Rating: 1 )
by purplestary on
Tuesday, 8th March 2005 @ 10:39:46 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
|
| a little choppy but overalll a good write..you expressed yourself well...i'm not a good writer or anything but the only thing i can really comment about is working on the flow of it..i need to do the same for most of mine. thank you for posting and i look forward to more from you. |
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Re: Bleeding Away My Life
(User Rating: 1 )
by PoetBaby814 on
Wednesday, 9th March 2005 @ 06:09:54 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| nice i like it |
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Re: Bleeding Away My Life
(User Rating: 1 )
by Overstated on
Friday, 11th March 2005 @ 09:11:12 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| I love this - so honest in your delivery of this piece Im gonna have to read more of your work! excellent stuff |
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Re: Bleeding Away My Life
(User Rating: 1 )
by SilentPwn on
Friday, 25th March 2005 @ 03:01:19 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| It's a nice poem, overall. You do need to work on the flow a bit. Some lines flowed well and others were choppy. Lovely poem though. |
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Re: Bleeding Away My Life
(User Rating: 1 )
by Mallard8 on
Sunday, 27th March 2005 @ 01:04:57 AM AEST
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a Message)
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That was dope, totally made me think of my poems. Cause mine always describe and end up with me hurting myself in them... and sadly real life.... go read them and tell me what you think. Peace
Sc |
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