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DARE I
Contributed by
bibi
on
Friday, 4th March 2005 @ 06:14:48 PM in AEST
Topic:
LovePoetry
|
Dare I let you step inside
Into this love I know I hide
Dare I let you break the seal
That keeps me safe from all I feel
Dare I let you find your place
Inside this heart so full of ache
Dare I let you touch my soul
Way down deep where noone goes
Dare I let this love escape
Take a chance, accept this fate
Dare I let your love shine in
Run this race and hope I win
Dare I give my heart to you
and pray you feel the same way too
Copyright ©
bibi
... [
2005-03-04 18:14:48]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: DARE I
(User Rating: 1 )
by nabokovfan87 on
Friday, 4th March 2005 @ 06:27:28 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
| nice write but coul be better just one thing i noticed was it seemed really redundant with anll of the dare i's. i understand that u were trying to achieve something else but it didnt seem to have a positive effect on me as a reader. try changing them and seeing if that makes it stronger. nice thought though and gl with it..... |
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Re: DARE I
(User Rating: 1 )
by Beniam on
Friday, 4th March 2005 @ 06:28:30 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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Wow, I've never read a poem that aghasted my heart the way this write did. I personally thank you, even tho it wasn't for me ;)
That was awwwsome!! |
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Re: DARE I
(User Rating: 1 )
by purplestary on
Friday, 4th March 2005 @ 06:31:00 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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| i love this! it flows so well and holds great meaning. you have a great talent. |
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