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I Forgot To BREATH
Contributed by
concrete_rose
on
Friday, 25th February 2005 @ 11:07:22 AM in AEST
Topic:
EmotionalPoetry
|
I never believed in love at 1st site, until I saw your face. (inhale, exhale)
I never knew what a kiss felt like, until your lips I tasted. (inhale, exhale)
I never knew how it felt to be held, until you put your arms around me. (inhale, exhale)
I never knew where to search for true love, until one day you found me. (inhale, exhale)
I never knew how to cry a million tears, until you broke my heart. (inhale, exhale)
I found it not very easy to live as we grew apart. (inhale..........exhale)
I never knew what it felt like for the love of my life to leave, you were relieved, I felt decieved, when you left I died because I forgot to BREATH. (without you there''s nothing for me to achieve, you''re the reason why i BREATH.
Copyright ©
concrete_rose
... [
2005-02-25 11:07:22]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: I Forgot To BREATH
(User Rating: 1 )
by Stitch on
Friday, 25th February 2005 @ 11:42:35 AM AEST
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You've captured that feeling with the impact and intensity it deserves, but you need an e on the end of breathe.
Stitch |
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Re: I Forgot To BREATH
(User Rating: 1 )
by Dusty on
Friday, 25th February 2005 @ 12:33:48 PM AEST
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Very interesting the way you put this together. I liked the ending most of all, kind of a more upbeat poem even though it is sad.
~Dusty~ |
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Re: I Forgot To BREATH
(User Rating: 1 )
by Jen54 on
Friday, 25th February 2005 @ 01:58:55 PM AEST
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i loved it!!!
I know what it is like to love someone and feel safe with them and then they leave us.
great write.
-Jen |
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Re: I Forgot To BREATH
(User Rating: 1 )
by SimplyMe on
Saturday, 26th February 2005 @ 02:18:20 AM AEST
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Omg!! I completely relate to this poem.. all except for the end. I'm still trying to get to know him better. I myself don't understand love at first sight... but i honestly think i've experienced it. By the way i also know how it feels to lose a true love. It hurts, but in time it will mend, somebody else will come along and nothing else will matter. Much love
~Alucia~ |
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Re: I Forgot To BREATH
(User Rating: 1 )
by Deleterious_Dislike on
Monday, 28th February 2005 @ 05:52:08 PM AEST
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I would of done this..
'I never believed in love at 1st site, until I saw your face. (inhale, exhale)
I never knew what a kiss felt like, until your lips I tasted. (inhale, exhale)
I never knew how it felt to be held, until you put your arms around me. (..inhale...)
I never knew where to search for true love, until one day you found me. (...exhale..)
I never knew how to cry a million tears, until you broke my heart. (inhale...)
I found it not very easy to live as we grew apart. (.....exhale)
I never knew what it felt like for the love of my life to leave, you were relieved, I felt decieved, when you left I died because I forgot to BREATH. (without you there''s nothing for me to achieve, you''re the reason why i BREATH.)
But thats me. The layout/structure was intriguing. It was very sweet to read.
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Re: I Forgot To BREATH
(User Rating: 1 )
by Wachumiri on
Thursday, 23rd March 2006 @ 02:31:00 PM AEST
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I never knew where to search for true love, until one day you found me.
...I really like that line, especially. Yes, sometimes love can kill, and love knows well how to kill, because love is the essence of life, to live without love is to utterly die.
Take care.
David |
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