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''My Disorder III Ad Infinitum...''

Contributed by xMizeriex on Saturday, 19th February 2005 @ 11:48:07 AM in AEST
Topic: selfstruggles

A force of nature,
And one to be reckoned with,
An organic manifestation,
Of a torrid megalith,
I am strong and proud,
I am persistant,
I will rise to the top by,
Excerting my tenaciousness.
I will overcome,
And break the cast,
Abregate my faults,
I will outlast!
I will take my fears
by the throat,
And scream in the
faces of the worms,
of imprisionment.
To break free from the shackles,
That opressed me,
And CAN NOT POSSESS ME.
As cunning as the Jackle,
I will devour and thrive on
the souls of the weak,
To be an advocate,
Of my Gods eternally.
I abandon all thoughts acrid,
yet with affidivit diatribe i'll
destroy enemies with my words abrasive.
Like a phoenix from the flames,
I will emerge from my rebirth,
And blossom like petals
from a trapestine flower.
Bloom to power,
And evolve.
The ebony apples,
in the liquid chocolate of my eyes,
contain the 'fruits' of my existance,
Profound and infectious,
Deadly and callous,
Like the poisonous kin of
The Mandrake.
I will not stop this quest for knowledge,
I thirst, I ache, I hunger for more,
It's my release, my panacea,
My 'Refuse for the pain wh*re'.
I am ever more determined,
So callisthenic,
Visualise my goals,
And won't stop until I reach it.
I will strive to find new meaning,
And never relinquish,
And though I have found myself,
I will never cease to find more,
To raise a glass with a drink to good health,
And release everything I abhor.
I am bathed in beauty and elegance,
I'm well aware that that sound vain,
But to all those who ponder this,
You've never contemplated true pain.
I have been abandoned,
used,
Enslaved and abated,
Melancholy,
Forgotten,
Ignored,
Bruised and hated.
Abased,
Cankered,
An object for Malignance,
A mannequin for turpitude,
(And I can't forgive this)
Physical and Sexual
Child abuse victim,
I know my past and
I'M NOT ASHAMED TO ADMIT IT!
With every flithy little secret,
A scar that they hold,
And looking at me now,
You would never know.
I have conquered my crusifiction,
At the hands of those,
Who nefariously dictated my life,
As they chose.
I've broken stereotypes,
As my unique self unfurls,
To no longer succumb,
As a broken puppet girl.
With a cold Ophidian heart,
And lepidoteran wings,
I am immune to any twisted games,
As with delicate desire my new
Life begins.
And through all the agony my sacred heart,
Now beats furiously in it's vaults,
And as the brutal wardrum sounds on,
I learn to love and accept my faults.
You can attempt to addle me or sully my name,
But magnanimosity is my wealth,
Nethertheless you can try to tear me down,

Because I will always cannibalize
to Repair myself.

(c) Bethanie Martell, 19th February 2005.

Copyright © xMizeriex ... [ 2005-02-19 11:48:07]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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