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keep going
Contributed by
catz77
on
Tuesday, 8th February 2005 @ 07:21:32 PM in AEST
Topic:
InspirationalPoems
|
a long time ago when i was 8
are whole family was together for christmas
now too many are gone
hurtful indeed
i love every one
and still keep in touch
demons attacking from left to right
my family slowly was tearing apart
i didnt want to see any of it but
now life is so slow
i hate it so much
wishing for that one christmas to come again
but i learned a long time ago to let go of the past
and dodge whats coming at you
Copyright ©
catz77
... [
2005-02-08 19:21:32]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: keep going
(User Rating: 1 )
by CurtisC on
Thursday, 10th February 2005 @ 12:41:24 AM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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i dont really see anything wrong with it...could maybe use some rhyming to help it flow a little better, but other then its great :)
curtis |
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Re: keep going
(User Rating: 1 )
by freckle on
Thursday, 10th February 2005 @ 04:28:16 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| I'm not sure...I will read it again later and let you know what I think. I get the message you are trying to get across, but there is something not 'right' with the way it is...it may just be the flow...I'll message you later and thanks for asking for my opinion...that's all I have to give. |
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