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Unzipped

Contributed by rxqueen on Friday, 28th January 2005 @ 06:49:35 PM in AEST
Topic: selfstruggles



unzip my flesh
tear away this skin
rip open old wounds
and look within

my heart
is it still beating?
I must be alive
for I am still bleeding

make me feel
even if it is pain
do not let my life
be in vain

unzip my flesh
tear away this skin
do you see a soul
or only sin?

my heart
is it still beating?
or does it house
emptyness breeding?

make me feel
even if it is pain
so much more to lose
and I fear nothing to gain...





Copyright © rxqueen ... [ 2005-01-28 18:49:35]
(Date/Time posted on site)





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Re: Unzipped (User Rating: 1 )
by New_York_Chick on Friday, 28th January 2005 @ 07:08:01 PM AEST
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that was a very interesting poem, it made me think
thnx for writting this


Re: Unzipped (User Rating: 1 )
by deadheadpoet on Friday, 28th January 2005 @ 07:23:29 PM AEST
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Very moving write. Much peace.


Re: Unzipped (User Rating: 1 )
by DorianChambers on Friday, 28th January 2005 @ 07:57:18 PM AEST
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this a serious peice of writting i almost passed over it frankly cause of the title, i didn't find it short at all, what i found it 2 be was very enjoyable 2 read . . . yeh i know never judge a book by it's cover, so i'm an idiot, lol . . . well done . . .

Dorian Chambers


Re: Unzipped (User Rating: 1 )
by Spazzo on Friday, 28th January 2005 @ 08:58:46 PM AEST
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This is excellent. I hope things get better for you.

Spazzo


Re: Unzipped (User Rating: 1 )
by blowfish_jane on Saturday, 29th January 2005 @ 04:06:00 AM AEST
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Wow that's some write, it's vivid and dark.
I liked how you wrote it the rymings good and the flow was smooth.
It was an easy read, good write Jocelyn.

Jane


Re: Unzipped (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Sunday, 30th January 2005 @ 05:20:07 PM AEST
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Wow, that was morbid, and we all know I like morbid! Thisone just grabs you adn forces you into it! Great job!


Re: Unzipped (User Rating: 1 )
by autumngreeneyes on Sunday, 30th January 2005 @ 06:44:11 PM AEST
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Yes..we need to feel..I know of the numbness you talk about .. I saw the word zip..and I thought..well never mind..it's cause I just a dirty poem about the mile high club and my mind's in the gutter..sorry..


Re: Unzipped (User Rating: 1 )
by UnlovedChild on Saturday, 5th February 2005 @ 04:47:59 AM AEST
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Wow Joce! It was great. Kinda scary, but it's wonderful touch of emotion! Love ya chicka!




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