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Hiking through Hell...
Contributed by
Unheard_Mute
on
Wednesday, 26th January 2005 @ 04:53:28 AM in AEST
Topic:
DarkPoetry
|
I'm walking through a little scattered wood
Trees overhead, the calm breaze feels good
Just a little kid, hardly big enough to think
Then it all happens so fast, I stopped and I blinked
Don't think my mind's straight when I open my eyes to a haze
Can barely see past the smoke, only to see my woods ablaze
A phase, a moment, but it feels like forever
Pleading on my knees, can't hold my forest together
Trees start falling, they crash and they fry
Soon I'll burn up as well, burnin as I die
Heat starts to seep in, everything turns to fuzz
Come back to, everything is back to like it was
And the cycle goes on...
Copyright ©
Unheard_Mute
... [
2005-01-26 04:53:28] (Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Hiking through Hell...
(User Rating: 1 ) by afterdark on
Wednesday, 26th January 2005 @ 07:46:14 AM AEST (User
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a Message)
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This was one that could have used more work..It was a good write but could have been so much better..Vauge in some areas not that it is bad to be vauge but just a bit much h ere..Other then all that I did like the feel of it.. |
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Re: Hiking through Hell...
(User Rating: 1 ) by valek on
Wednesday, 26th January 2005 @ 11:25:41 AM AEST (User
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a Message)
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im not going to agree with the other guy about this poem. it was great man, you wrote it the way you felt it and thats how it came out, loved it....-valek- |
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Re: Hiking through Hell...
(User Rating: 1 ) by Bohemian_with_a_pen on
Friday, 28th January 2005 @ 11:11:09 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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nice one james
caiti/ninja |
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Re: Hiking through Hell...
(User Rating: 1 ) by killingmehslowly on
Saturday, 29th January 2005 @ 10:33:50 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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*unsure quite what to think* It was good, don't get me wrong. Not quite sure I get it though....too much for my little brain. Tell me about it Monday....-Sami- |
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