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Needle Park
Contributed by
Bryon
on
Sunday, 23rd January 2005 @ 03:27:12 AM in AEST
Topic:
drugabuse
|
Needle Park
To hit the sky
I need a pop;
I should have asked,
“Are you a cop?”
And so I fade;
hey, watch my rig,
I close my eyes,
and out I wig.
If I get sick
don’t take my sash.
It may look sharp,
but holds no cash.
There’s not enough,
in this my spoon,
to spike the sun…
ran out too soon.
I’m still nearby,
but now I’m done;
all visions gone…
I’ve missed the sun.
My hopes were high,
my plight was dark;
across the tracks…
in Needle Park.
Copyright ©
Bryon
... [
2005-01-23 03:27:12]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Needle Park
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Sunday, 23rd January 2005 @ 03:34:17 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| wow, this is good. I don't know anything about drugs or their addiction, I'm one the few who have never tried it, but you captured a real sense of what I'd assume it must be like. |
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Re: Needle Park
(User Rating: 1 )
by bluebird on
Sunday, 23rd January 2005 @ 05:58:43 AM AEST
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a Message)
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i know these feelings too much,u captured them well without going over the top.
great work.
~keep the faith~
BB |
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Re: Needle Park
(User Rating: 1 )
by freckle on
Sunday, 23rd January 2005 @ 09:24:44 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| Really good poem. Your words enable the reader to feel the hopes of euphoria yet feel the missed high. I think anyone who has experienced passion with anything can relate to this. I've never done drugs but I have had many other times in life; expected a great high yet felt disappointment when the moment wasn't quite right. Great job! |
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Re: Needle Park
(User Rating: 1 )
by QueenEEliz33 on
Sunday, 23rd January 2005 @ 12:43:27 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| your poem was really good, you hit the emotions of being high right on the nose, I like the title too. |
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Re: Needle Park
(User Rating: 1 )
by Rxqueen on
Sunday, 23rd January 2005 @ 01:43:58 PM AEST
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| This was a very good peice. It really got me, gave me knots in my stomach. I guess I can relate a little too much so it made me a little uncomfortable, but that meens it is a powerful write. Thank you so much for sharing. And if this is about you, if you ever want to talk I would love to, I think we might be going through the same thing... ONce again great job sweetie. |
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Re: Needle Park
(User Rating: 1 )
by Alina on
Tuesday, 1st February 2005 @ 08:48:56 PM AEST
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a Message)
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The first words that came out of my mouth after reading this was DAME! This poem had all the right words and all the right thought, depth and feeling!! It kicks ass and can hit someone where it hurts. So little with so much meaning.
ALINA
GREAT JOB!! |
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Re: Needle Park
(User Rating: 1 )
by InfinitePoet on
Thursday, 4th August 2011 @ 01:27:56 PM AEST
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Wow!! What is really goin on!!? this is the shiznit!! I felt like i was right here in my hood! Why is the place to cop always across the tracks!! i'm in nor cali so i know there's hella places in the usa thats over the tracks i bet!! Ain't no shame in my words or my lifestyle nor my street solider metaliy!! I like people who arent afraid to write their realitys and share them with millions of people!! Great work!! Keep writing always!! keep postimg and sharing!!
Peace,
Dana |
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