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The Last Cut of Life
Contributed by
silent
on
Saturday, 15th January 2005 @ 02:02:47 AM in AEST
Topic:
Suicide
|
Red roses sit beneath my tired young feet
My head slowly turns, as our eyes now meet
Scars like trails run down my arms
Whilst your mouth moves speaking unknown charms
Razor now resting upon pulsing vein
Head spinning, voices winning, never ending pain
The movement is swift, to sharp pain i relate
It won't take too long, till it seals my young fate
All the while, wondering with each spurt of red
Whats become of my mind, as it's soon to be dead
Reading your face as my vision turns to black
A burning image, a tear, as you turn and walk back..
Copyright ©
silent
... [
2005-01-15 02:02:47]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: The Last Cut of Life
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Saturday, 15th January 2005 @ 02:09:00 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| Such a sad and deep write. There's so much emotion in this wonderful poem. Awesome job! |
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Re: The Last Cut of Life
(User Rating: 1 )
by Jezabel on
Saturday, 15th January 2005 @ 07:52:19 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| very sad & expressive luv. |
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Re: The Last Cut of Life
(User Rating: 1 )
by lostinmyself on
Saturday, 15th January 2005 @ 04:17:01 PM AEST
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a Message)
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I am glad this is just a memory, but also very very sad you went through this.
Loks like you're getting into writing again, huh?
This is fantastic.
Never stop writing and always be strong.
*hugs* Phil xxx |
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Re: The Last Cut of Life
(User Rating: 1 )
by tractorbabe on
Sunday, 16th January 2005 @ 11:17:35 PM AEST
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a Message)
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this is exreamly well ritten. wow ..its amazing how you put all them words down and made them fit so perfectly .your very gifted ..keep rightin
tractorbabe |
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Re: The Last Cut of Life
(User Rating: 1 )
by SocialMisfit on
Friday, 21st January 2005 @ 01:07:43 AM AEST
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very deep and very emotional and also darn cool read way to go
SM
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Re: The Last Cut of Life
(User Rating: 1 )
by ladyfawn on
Saturday, 5th February 2005 @ 02:16:47 AM AEST
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hauntingly brilliant...... hugs n' love nessa
@->>->:- |
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Re: The Last Cut of Life
(User Rating: 1 )
by Shattered_soul on
Sunday, 4th December 2005 @ 01:55:55 AM AEST
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a Message)
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Another beautiful write, you and I are common in some ways, its sad really.
~S.S |
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Re: The Last Cut of Life
(User Rating: 1 )
by weepingprophet on
Thursday, 5th January 2006 @ 01:38:21 AM AEST
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beautiful. I am always excited to read of such honesty in such an elegant way. You took this memory and stretched it into perfection, the simplicity of your words placed so strategically to capture the heart of the act. My favorite line was
"Razor now resting upon pulisng vein
head spinning, voices winning, never ending pain."
The last line of the stanza i geuss you could call it was just so wonderfully matched with the first line. It brought a sense of urgency to me and a hard hitting finality.
A burning image, a tear, as you turn and walk back.....
insanely descriptive, and emotive.
~until she slips, slits her wrists, life ashen in her mouth~weepingprophet |
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