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Brian
Contributed by
O7NeVeS
on
Tuesday, 11th January 2005 @ 03:20:26 AM in AEST
Topic:
LovePoetry
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He works inside of a hospital
And gives his patients Tylenol
He’s a patient care technician
But I can see him as a magician
He’s real sweet with his patients
And for that he must have patience
Cuz he’s been nothing else but sweet
Meeting him has been such a treat!
I hope we can hang out more
Cuz when he’s around I can soar
Flying high above everyone else
He makes my heart want to melt
He’s almost as sarcastic as I
And always looks me straight in the eye
He’s also a bit of an actor
With his sign that of a cancer
We get along so well
That my grandma hears wedding bells
But I’m not too concerned with it
Because softballs we shall hit
I’m just looking to have some fun
Hopefully some fun in the sun
I know this poem must sound corny
But I must write when outside is stormy
I’m afraid this poem has come to an end
With Brian being my hospital friend
Copyright ©
O7NeVeS
... [
2005-01-11 03:20:26] (Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Brian
(User Rating: 1 ) by Kalika on
Tuesday, 11th January 2005 @ 03:36:01 AM AEST (User
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a Message)
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It's caregivers like this that make me able to tolerate being in the hospital so much. The simple things they will do can mean all the world. This flowed really nicely in the begining, but there was a fumble somewhere in the middle and I couldn't get it back after that.
Kali |
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Re: Brian
(User Rating: 1 ) by afterdark on
Tuesday, 11th January 2005 @ 07:42:41 AM AEST (User
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a Message)
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Not really a poem here..To fluffy and just lacks anything real.. |
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Re: Brian
(User Rating: 1 ) by CurtisC on
Friday, 4th March 2005 @ 01:46:03 AM AEST (User
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a Message)
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afterdark needs to stick it :) i liked it some parts, didn't in others.. it seems like you rushed to finish it, like you put more thought in the beggining and just threw the rest together real quick like...it was good though, got the point across just the same :)
Curtis |
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