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Anniversary
Contributed by
bobotheclown
on
Wednesday, 4th December 2002 @ 12:00:00 AM in AEST
Topic:
Suicide
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Its been a year now,
But this anniversary
Will not be celebrated
With candles, song, and dance
Or champagne or fireworks
No, I'll just be given
Another dose of meds
I hate feeling like this
Sad, downcast, and sore
Everything is dark
I can't see my attackers
Yet, they bring me down so easily
And wound me grieviously
While I try to fight them off, alone
Unconsciousness is my drug
Or maybe just a dream
For when I am conscious
They attack and scar my mind
Tear at my already weakened body
Instead of being courageous
I'm scared and cowardly
They attack in waves
And divide my body, amongst their devilish hordes
And as I scream in unknown agony
It only seems to draw out
Their pent up fury
Their eyes filled with demonic energy
Seem to tactfully avoid my fear-ridden eyes
Its your birthday
My anniversary
While you celebrate
I will remember, or try to
What it was like to be filled with joy
And I'll try not to cut,
But remembering you is hard
And the darkness surrounds me
In its cold, uninviting embrace
Cutting myself on things unseen
Losing my way, as no light is provided
I rub myself trying to draw in some warmth
I'm left with no answers
So I'll sit here and cry... silently
Sitting here the pressure is immense
I feel like I'm about to explode or drown
The depression, loneliness, rejection
Needless to say I'm not celebrating
Outside its raining and cold
A mirror image of how I feel
Maybe its time for me to leave this place
I think I've had enough
Copyright ©
bobotheclown
... [
2002-12-04 00:00:00] (Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Anniversary
(User Rating: 1 ) by Delusions on
Wednesday, 4th December 2002 @ 02:32:47 AM AEST (User
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a Message)
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oh wow.... great write, this seems very close to home with me and you have expressed your feelings wonderfully! I hope things get better for you,
~Delusions~ |
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Re: Anniversary
(User Rating: 1 ) by wyrd_faerie on
Wednesday, 4th December 2002 @ 05:05:42 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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i don't know what to say...wow...this is beautiful...wow...it's so amazing, it's just amazing... |
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Re: Anniversary
(User Rating: 1 ) by OreO on
Wednesday, 4th December 2002 @ 08:37:14 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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I myself have been rejected before and it's certainly not a good feeling but you know who you are deep inside more than anyone ever possibly could and all you should remember is it's their loss that they didnt take the love that was presented to them....this is a beautiful write, one which i truly enjoyed alot...thanks for sharing this one...
.:*~*:.OreO.:*~*:. |
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Re: Anniversary
(User Rating: 1 ) by ashleigh4 on
Thursday, 5th December 2002 @ 05:30:52 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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for someone to write this.... i was diagnosed with depression, and with that, "thinking too much". i think you also have this gift, you can empathise with others and can express yourself well.... thankyou |
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Re: Anniversary
(User Rating: 1 ) by tier on
Sunday, 2nd February 2003 @ 05:31:59 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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Joel, i know what ur feeling in this poem i have a few days before my year anniversary with the only person i could ever see myself with and i remember the feeling and the hate for myself the depression i had and the meds but im working on leavign all that behind me even if i cant leave him behind me im hoping i can live or tryy to live with out him and be happy all at the same time......
Tier |
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