|
 Menu
|
|
|
|
|
Social
|
|
|
|
|
Yes I wanna say it!
Contributed by
denish
on
Saturday, 8th January 2005 @ 11:50:55 AM in AEST
Topic:
LovePoetry
|
Let this life be started all over again,
Again, from the moment,
When we were strangers,
When suddenly,
Everything changed to a bewitching attraction.
When knowingly and unknowingly,
Hands wrote a name in the air for the first time
When lips whispered a name to the breeze
When bleary eyes saw a face in the stars,
When the image of future took an alluring shape
When it was death at every moment of separation
When pain of this death was dear
Equally to the joy of nearness, when you were there
Now again when I’m dying of separation
I see the ash flying up in the wind
Again and again
Begging you to let it have the sufferings
The sorrows of separation
The stabs of pain
Till the time when every dustcell cries out
I love you, love you, and love you immensely.
Copyright ©
denish
... [
2005-01-08 11:50:55]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
Advertisments:
|
|
|
|
|
|
Sorry, comments are no longer allowed for anonymous, please register for a free membership to access this feature and more
|
|
All comments are owned by the poster. Your Poetry
Dot Com is not responsible for the content of any
comment.
That said, if you find an offensive comment, please
contact via the FeedBack Form with details, including poem title
etc.
|
|
|
Re: Yes I wanna say it!
(User Rating: 1 )
by Stitch on
Saturday, 8th January 2005 @ 11:56:57 AM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
This was fascinating. I was impressed with the depth of feeling and the creativity with which you expressed yourself. I look forward to reading more by you.
Stitch |
|
|
Re: Yes I wanna say it!
(User Rating: 1 )
by pixie on
Saturday, 8th January 2005 @ 12:03:08 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
very good poem, I will second what Stitch said as I also look forward to reading more from you
pixie xx |
|
|
Re: Yes I wanna say it!
(User Rating: 1 )
by autumngreeneyes on
Saturday, 8th January 2005 @ 01:46:45 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
I really liked this, and the only thing I would change, if anything, is I feel it is a bit redundant..with the use of again.
Let this life be started all over again,
Again, from the moment,
When we were strangers,
as an example, I would say,
"Let this life be started over,
Again, from the moment,
When we were strangers,"
that uses less verbage, and gives the poem more
power...Just a thought..:-)
|
|
|
|
· 
Poetry
Community
Members
Areas
Reference
Search
Top
Others
