|
Menu
|
|
|
Social
|
|
|
|
THE BLADE THAT IS MINE
Contributed by
pUnKa_RaCh
on
Friday, 31st December 2004 @ 12:33:53 AM in AEST
Topic:
DarkPoetry
|
i reach for the cold blade
and i begin to feel relief
in my bath of blood i wade
the blade is no longer cold
it makes my skin warm
brings numbness to my body
as the wet tears begin to form
the cuts are pure
i try to slice at my shame
forgiveness from the blood
deliverance without a name.
the blood is always there
unlike you
on the red i can always depend
to follow thru
the hurt is gone
the emptiness begins to fade
i feel joy over
the temporary comfort I have made
my blade is mine
its there for me to keep
i hide the scars
that secretly run so deep
i carve "Lost Forever"
into my leg
for that is my name
i once had a future
now nothings the same
this feels too good
it should be a sin
no one can take away
this ecstasy that im in.
Copyright ©
pUnKa_RaCh
... [
2004-12-31 00:33:53] (Date/Time posted on
site)
Advertisments:
|
|
|
|
|
Sorry, comments are no longer allowed for anonymous, please register for a free membership to access this feature and more
|
|
All comments are owned by the poster. Your Poetry
Dot Com is not responsible for the content of any
comment. That said, if you find an offensive comment, please
contact via the FeedBack Form with details, including poem title
etc.
|
|
|
Re: THE BLADE THAT IS MINE
(User Rating: 1 ) by blacksabbath026 on
Friday, 31st December 2004 @ 12:49:51 AM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
i cant say that i dont cut bcuz i still do sometimes but u need to write about other things, everyone writes about cutting in dark poetry, i stay away from those topics even though they are impossible to avoid, u should read my poem Suffocated by Darkness, neways if u r gonna write about suicide or self mutilation then u need to be unique or else noone will take you seriously |
|
|
Re: THE BLADE THAT IS MINE
(User Rating: 1 ) by Riot_Girl on
Friday, 31st December 2004 @ 01:39:14 AM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
So ***** awesome.. god.. it made a cold shiver down my spine as it rushed me into the cold memorys of my past. very nice work, keep it up :)
-Julie |
|
|
Re: THE BLADE THAT IS MINE
(User Rating: 1 ) by sicknivesevered on
Friday, 31st December 2004 @ 06:03:05 AM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Though blacksabbath026 makes a valid point about how most Dark Poetry writes are about carving, I didn't feel any trace of generic BS in your poem. And even though I don't wield a blade myself, I thought it was really good. So f*** all the unoriginal poems out there, beacuse this write is brilliant. My favorite part is:
"the cuts are pure
i try to slice at my shame
forgiveness from the blood
deliverance without a name.
the blood is always there
unlike you
on the red i can always depend
to follow thru"
Excellent work.
P.S. - Thank you for your comment on "Cling With Me" and yes, they are lyrics. |
|
|
Re: THE BLADE THAT IS MINE
(User Rating: 1 ) by Essentially9 on
Thursday, 13th January 2005 @ 08:49:39 PM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
maybe someday youll find another comfort. powerful and well written poem. nice show of talent. |
|
|
|