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He Took More Than My Money
Contributed by
DesolantDreamer
on
Thursday, 30th December 2004 @ 10:20:43 PM in AEST
Topic:
Grief
|
Silent tears fall from my eyes
As I sit in the corner of my dark room
Blood falls from my nose and my lip
My face is bruised and cut from his attack
He took more than my money
He took more than my jewelry
I sit and cry with the dirty feeling he left on me
That man took something I treasured
Something I cherished
He took my virginity.
I cry harder and harder
A light appears in my room
It is the door. It is opening.
You step in. Your eyes are sacred
I cry out and run into your open arms
I tell you everything
You cry with me
I feel a little better
I love you mumma
Copyright ©
DesolantDreamer
... [
2004-12-30 22:20:43]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: He Took More Than My Money
(User Rating: 1 )
by Essentially9 on
Thursday, 30th December 2004 @ 10:22:47 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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| this has happened to too many young women. ::angered:: |
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Re: He Took More Than My Money
(User Rating: 1 )
by K_kelly on
Thursday, 30th December 2004 @ 10:53:54 PM AEST
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a Message)
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that was written wonderfully, i dont think i could have written or said it better. it also shows how much people shouled cherish their moms in that time of need. all dont have
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Re: He Took More Than My Money
(User Rating: 1 )
by Blackevar on
Friday, 31st December 2004 @ 05:57:01 AM AEST
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a Message)
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Hi
I hate to be critical and please be assured it's only because I believe you have a nice style, but I kind of think that it's obvious that it's a situation you have not experienced this
shows itself in the writng, it is too interpretive,
I have done this myself and it is good to try topics creatively, but I think you would be much stronger sticking to stuff you know.
All the best!
Blackevar |
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