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Parallel
Contributed by
AgeOfAquarias1960
on
Wednesday, 29th December 2004 @ 04:42:01 PM in AEST
Topic:
DarkPoetry
|
Where there is love there to is hate
where there freedom there to is bondage
where there is lavish there to is poverty
where there is courage there to is fear
where there is noblity there to is scandal
where there is joy there to is sorrow
where there is life there is to death
Where there is existence there is parallel
for where there is light there is shadow
thus where there is shadow there is light
and where there is light there to is hope
and where there is hope there to is despair
Copyright ©
AgeOfAquarias1960
... [
2004-12-29 16:42:01]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Parallel
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Wednesday, 29th December 2004 @ 04:45:10 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Great write! I really enjoyed this one.
No matter what good we have, we should always take a moment to understand that we're lucky because it could always be worse.
Thanks for sharing :-) |
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Re: Parallel
(User Rating: 1 )
by Essentially9 on
Wednesday, 29th December 2004 @ 04:57:29 PM AEST
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| this poem seemed awkward in most parts because of lack of punctuation or the wrong use of grammar. "where there is...there to(should be too) is" was over used. in the second stanza you changed it up a bit, but it was still the same. you broke a stricted format in the first stanza and many times in the second stanza. |
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Re: Parallel
(User Rating: 1 )
by Dri on
Wednesday, 29th December 2004 @ 05:32:17 PM AEST
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| a little repetive for my tastes, but i love the feel |
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Re: Parallel
(User Rating: 1 )
by blacksabbath026 on
Thursday, 30th December 2004 @ 12:21:56 AM AEST
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| whats the point? you are just listing opposites |
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Re: Parallel
(User Rating: 1 )
by hellsfallenangel on
Tuesday, 15th November 2005 @ 09:58:29 AM AEST
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a Message)
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interesting very interesting thats all i got 2 say bye
DEMONS A.K.A ABBADON |
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