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Immortal
Contributed by
surge_joebot
on
Friday, 17th December 2004 @ 05:47:43 PM in AEST
Topic:
DarkPoetry
|
Time comes around again to die.
Death on your door step.
Reep you, deep in you, dead you.
You no longer you.
No longer here.
Your last breath,
Your last sleep.
Immortal sleep.
Death took you.
Death came knocking.
You answered.
Your last kiss.
Your immoral kiss.
Copyright ©
surge_joebot
... [
2004-12-17 17:47:43]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Immortal
(User Rating: 1 )
by Essentially9 on
Friday, 17th December 2004 @ 06:36:15 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
|
| needs to have some different rhymes than the same word. other than that good write. |
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Re: Immortal
(User Rating: 1 )
by punkprincess6689 on
Friday, 17th December 2004 @ 09:09:52 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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| i liked it it was very descriptive |
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Re: Immortal
(User Rating: 1 )
by PhantomVampyress on
Saturday, 18th December 2004 @ 02:04:57 AM AEST
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a Message)
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i really liked the way you expressed about dying here awesome job
peace and hope
JENNI |
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