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just leave me alone
Contributed by
punkprincessof2004
on
Monday, 13th December 2004 @ 04:05:20 PM in AEST
Topic:
EmotionalPoetry
|
When I tell you to stop
STOP!
When I tell you just to drop things
Then drop it
Maybe its the fact you think your right
Maybe its the fact you worry about me then your own self
Maybe sometimes I cant handle it
So why wont you just stop the *****
I refuse to do what you tell me too
Because I am my own person that stays true
Tired of you telling me whats right for me and wrong
Makes me feel like I dont belong
Hurts me so
Makes me want to let go
Let me be who I want to be
Make mistakes as they come
If not I will never learn
You cant tell me to be something Im not
Im grown just not fully an adult
Just let me learn whats right from wrong
Dont act like your my friend
Just leave me alone when I wanna be left alone
Dont ask me whats wrong when you already know
My life isnt yours so stop making it that way
Stop making me cry
Stop making me feel weak
No you shut up im trying to speak
Its like you never listen
Like you want everyone to know what you think
Like you power over me because you are who you are
No one listens to me because of you and your mouth
Makes me wanna shake you and tell you to stop
The things you do annoy me beyond the top
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
I wanna do nonstop
When I'm around you near you
I wanna punch the wall
I wanna pull my hair out
I wanna leave here
I dont wanna be there
I feel so lonely
Like no one is listening
Like no one even hears me
I can go on
but seriously this ***** would be to long
kinda like a short story
except this is the part
where i tell you im done
irritated as hell please let me be gone
im itchin my face and makin red marks
see em? arent they ugly
teaches you to stop
treat just as fair
as you want to be treated
dont tell me not to tell you to shut up if you say it back
i want the same damn respect
going nuts is all i can do
leave me alone you really need to
Copyright ©
punkprincessof2004
... [
2004-12-13 16:05:20]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: just leave me alone
(User Rating: 1 )
by Jishes_4_ever on
Monday, 13th December 2004 @ 04:18:51 PM AEST
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a Message)
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great write...
hope to c more from u soon
Jishes |
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Re: just leave me alone
(User Rating: 1 )
by ladyaryssa on
Monday, 13th December 2004 @ 04:58:49 PM AEST
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a Message)
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"but seriously this ***** would be to long
kinda like a short story
except this is the part
where i tell you im done"
This bit bothered me. As a reader of poetry I want to forget I'm reading a poem and envision what you're describing. This is a reminder of the fact that poems are something which take effort, and lots of it. The more effortless you make this kinda of free-verse style look, the more effective it is, I promise you.
I liked how the last line summarised the whole thing, twas your whole point. Very effective. But you don't need to overexplain stuff. You about got away with it here, but watch out for that in future poems. You got your point across, then again in the same way, and then again once more, in the same way. And that's OK sometimes, but I think you'd crete more effect if you were subtle, skirted round the point, and then the end would hit harder. It's a good end. It's a good subject. Most of all it's honest and real, which is what I love most of all about poetry. It should never be artificial. |
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Re: just leave me alone
(User Rating: 1 )
by punkprincessof2004 on
Monday, 13th December 2004 @ 09:48:24 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| im sorry my poem offended you, i write what i feel and i dont care what people think sorry |
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Re: just leave me alone
(User Rating: 1 )
by Bulldawg8879 on
Monday, 13th December 2004 @ 10:56:10 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| punk princess poetry is a work of art.. nothing on this site compares to it .. i am a poetry critic and i can say without a doubt these poems speak deeper meaning then anything else!! bah take that to the bank! |
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