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I Miss...
Contributed by
stellar
on
Friday, 3rd December 2004 @ 11:25:09 AM in AEST
Topic:
LostLove
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I miss the way you held my face in your hands
And kissed me as if tomorrow would never arrive
You reached inside until you found my heart
And breathed in your life until it came alive
I miss the way you loved me
It was so much more than I had dreamed
Our closeness was immeasurable
And where we met our souls was without a visable seam
But the years have changed you into someone else
You've pulled your heart away from mine
And where our bond seemed endless
There is now a very bold and parting line
It's hard to say exactly when your face
Became one I could not recognize
Though I know deep down it's still there
The light has all but vanished from your eyes
Copyright ©
stellar
... [
2004-12-03 11:25:09] (Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: I Miss...
(User Rating: 1 ) by In2thetwilightzone on
Friday, 3rd December 2004 @ 11:34:43 AM AEST (User
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a Message)
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aw, i give you my love |
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Re: I Miss...
(User Rating: 1 ) by MMISS on
Friday, 3rd December 2004 @ 11:55:48 AM AEST (User
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it's so sweet and sad too. time changes things. good poem! |
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Re: I Miss...
(User Rating: 1 ) by travisk on
Friday, 3rd December 2004 @ 11:56:42 AM AEST (User
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a Message)
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to say simply, it was wonderfully written
With a bit more complication, it revealed the outlays of a more complex struggle in love's unfair entanglements, giving hints of strong, life-changing events that will not be forgotten, especially after such strong words enforce the broken bonds' memories.
so ,yes I quite enjoyed it |
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Re: I Miss...
(User Rating: 1 ) by girltranscended on
Friday, 3rd December 2004 @ 05:24:53 PM AEST (User
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Oh, I like this alot. The ache. Most of us know it well, I sure do. This write is very touching, sweet, and true.
The thought behind this line:
"And where we met our souls was without a visable seam"
is so powerful, but might I put in my two cents... maybe a bit shorter would do ((and) our souls met without a seam). or (and where we met, our souls had no seam) . Just a thought.
Sends me back inside myself, when those thoughts were mine. They never do go away. I've read this now 3 or 4 times now within five minutes. At least I am not near tears like I was the first read through. A very good write! |
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Re: I Miss...
(User Rating: 1 ) by Essentially9 on
Wednesday, 1st June 2005 @ 09:52:57 PM AEST (User
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we all miss something, but there will be a time where you will not miss this. some things change, and some things never do. this was another amazing write. and im glad i read it. |
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Re: I Miss...
(User Rating: 1 ) by Dorkfish on
Monday, 20th June 2005 @ 02:57:17 PM AEST (User
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That is really sweet, but sad. Good one! |
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