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you are....
Contributed by
karmen
on
Saturday, 27th November 2004 @ 09:58:47 PM in AEST
Topic:
LovePoetry
|
you are my hearts every desire
in my eyes u lite a fire
i believe god meant for us to meet
as if your my hearts very beat
in my heart your name will lay
and i hope in yours mine will also stay
you make me more happy then anyone could ever know
and im pretty sure i let that show
together with u i always wanna be
together always you and me...
Copyright ©
karmen
... [
2004-11-27 21:58:47]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: you are....
(User Rating: 1 )
by alwayslost on
Saturday, 27th November 2004 @ 10:16:55 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| wow thats awesome. an excelent write. i also am a new writer, good job. |
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Re: you are....
(User Rating: 1 )
by emystar on
Sunday, 28th November 2004 @ 02:42:10 AM AEST
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Very good writing.
Jus keep letting it flow.
luv, huggs, smiles,
emy |
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Re: you are....
(User Rating: 1 )
by Jodwin on
Sunday, 28th November 2004 @ 10:08:55 AM AEST
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A good write.
As a "constructive criticism", I might have left out the 'also' in "and i hope in yours mine will also stay". But then again, I keep thinking poems as what they would sound like when spelt. |
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