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broken glass
Contributed by
luinil
on
Wednesday, 17th November 2004 @ 09:48:17 PM in AEST
Topic:
DarkPoetry
|
My feet tread on the shards
Of the lives ripped apart
By the promise of tomorrow
They lie scattered on the road
Showing me which way to go
This time I think I’ve gone too far though
I look up searching for your face
But you close your eyes and turn away
And join the line of those you followed
All the ones I thought I knew
Turn their backs to me like you
Trees and promises are hollow
Sharpener still with every sin
I cry out to you again
Choking on the lies I swallowed
So I crawl further down my path
Bleeding on the broken glass
Take one more fall to end my sorrow
Copyright ©
luinil
... [
2004-11-17 21:48:17]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: broken glass
(User Rating: 1 )
by ThePumpkinKing on
Wednesday, 17th November 2004 @ 09:52:36 PM AEST
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a Message)
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i can feel the pain here very well, though im sure it doesn't amount to what you must be feeling...i hope things will get better for you...really liked this write a lot...great job
God bless |
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Re: broken glass
(User Rating: 1 )
by Gothchyk on
Thursday, 18th November 2004 @ 08:35:23 AM AEST
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| The pain in this poem is so real, yet complicated to understand. But I guess all pain is like that, a number of components throwing "broken glass" at you to doge. Anyway, awesome write. |
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Re: broken glass
(User Rating: 1 )
by lostinmyself on
Thursday, 18th November 2004 @ 09:17:20 AM AEST
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Not to sound the same as everyone else commenting, but I also fel your pain.
(I know how lame that sounds)
The flow in this was perfect and every line made me want to read more.
The end left me wanting more too, I was just getting into it and it stopped.
Great write though.
*hugs* Phil xxx |
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Re: broken glass
(User Rating: 1 )
by Jenni_K on
Thursday, 25th November 2004 @ 08:08:35 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Written with so much emotions.. well done
Jenni |
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