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Revelation
Contributed by
gherkin
on
Thursday, 4th November 2004 @ 06:16:26 PM in AEST
Topic:
LoveRemembered
|
His lips slightly parted
He breathes deep and slow
Words whispered faintly
But so defined, they echo
"I don't love you,
Never did,
And i will never do"
That's about the point
Where i reached for a stone
So cold and smooth
In my sweating palms
It did not wait for me
But only in my mind,
Could i fight the truth.
And not for long,
Just till i found
I'm still sat here;
Bewildered I'd become
Another naive youth.
Numb, eyes glazed over
Didn't care, couldn't feel
I ran, stumbled
Trying to escape this feeling
Tears streamed
Hot and stingy,
Prickling my icey skin
I don't know where to hide
{anymore}
I don't know where i am
Copyright ©
gherkin
... [
2004-11-04 18:16:26]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Revelation
(User Rating: 1 )
by Deleterious_Dislike on
Tuesday, 9th November 2004 @ 04:04:49 PM AEST
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a Message)
|
This was very upsetting, and yet breath taking at the same time.
'Bewildered I'd become
Another naive youth.'
This part hit home with me. Naive maybe, but definatly sensitive and vunerable.
It's all part of growing up I'm afraid.
You expressed yourself very well.
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Re: Revelation
(User Rating: 1 )
by AlurTemptation on
Saturday, 15th January 2005 @ 01:02:25 PM AEST
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| Well written. I loved the first stansa. {I'm sorry. I can't spell.} |
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