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THE LOONIES ARE RUNNING THE ASYLUM! :-)
Contributed by
steeleyes
on
Monday, 1st November 2004 @ 07:25:55 PM in AEST
Topic:
political
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A little humour to lighten your busy voting day.....
*)
The experiment we've lived under for four years whereby the inmates ran the asylum is almost over!
What a weird bunch of loonies they are! Picture them now in your mind's eye...
What you need to do is conjure up a scene something like that in 'One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest'...
There is the totally wacky cross-eyed leader. He is REALLY out of it! They say his name is Bush. He keeps trying to say something but the sentences are SO garbled we can hardly imagine what he is babbling about. Put an ear to that slack mouth of his and see if you can catch one or two pearls of wisdom emanating from it. ;-)
'The truth of that matter is, if you listen carefully, Saddam would still be in power if he were the president of the United States, and the world would be a lot better off.' —(George W. Bush, second presidential debate, St. Louis, Mo., Oct. 8, 2004)
And he is the leader of this pack!? Yes really! The inmates have been running the asylum for the past four years!
Then there is the Uncle Fester look alike with the bald pate and maniac gleam in his eye and pockets stuffed full of dollar bills. For a party piece he is reputed to do or say anything you like as long as you keep pressing those greenbacks into his greedy mitts. They say he is only paranoid but actually they ARE out to get him!
In the corner we see sad Colin. He keeps mumbling incoherently about some recurring hallucination where he imagines himself addressing the United Nations. In this hallucination he just can't stop himself compulsively telling all these lies. The thing is incredible (literally!) he has all these graphs and s**t and he just keeps repeating 'These are stone cold facts. This is NOT mere speculation! Everything I am telling you is verified.' This last word seems to echo constantly through his brain because he keeps repeating it over and over and over again, shaking his head in utter disbelief. the trick psyclists say that he has this delusion he was fed a bunch of lies but I've seen them winking to one another knowingly...
Just back of Bushie Nobrain is Condi Rice. Man, have you seen her eyes! They swivel just like Linda Blair's in 'The Exorcist'! Some people say she was born to play the part of the bride of Frankenstein but I don't know... I think a remake of 'Psycho' in the original black and white might suit her better. Just stick a shocking grey wig on her and a couple of white contacts. Ugggghhhh... Man, that's just too scary to even contemplate!
Now there's a guy that keeps pushing to the front, what is it with these guys with the incoherence, have they got a babble bug or something!? This bullet-head drone goes by the name of Rummy the Dummy or something... He’s always to be found running about mumbling interminable sentences at the walls and any inanimate objects that comes in view. One end of the sentence could start at a fire hydrant and end up somewhere over at the water faucet and he’ll hardly pause for breath! They say he is the intellectual strategist for this bunch of deluded deadbeats... Well, I’m no Einstein but I know when I guy is bats and when he ain't. And this guy is for sure bats! Let’s listen in a while as his tiny mind rambles…
“There are known knowns. These are things we know that we know. There are known unknowns. That is to say, there are things that we know we don't know. But there are also unknown unknowns. There are things we don't know we don't know.”
Ah.......... yeah! Right Rummy (giving a pat on the head and pill between the salivating chops) run along now and play with some dynamite! (Or better still play hopscotch with this here land mine…)
Ah what a rich tapestry of low-life action we see here in the asylum! Man, can I tell you a story or two about these here air-heads!
But..., the experiment is coming to an end. The Supreme Court decided four years ago that these lunatics should be in charge of the asylum for a limited period of four years. My God I don’t know HOW we ever survived!
But now we are FINALLY nearing the end of this seemingly interminable and hopefully never to be repeated experiment. I can tell you the nursing staff are about at their wits end! So goodbye you poor dribbling loons, the nightmare is finally over!
Hey, wait a minute! We're they're saying those crazy judges may be thinking of repeating the experiment! No!Noooooooooooooooooooo...
Quick!!! While they’re not looking! Wrench that heavy water unit off the floor John! Help him Bill, quickly now! You too Al, all hands to the deck!
Now, help me toss it straight through the window! Let’s leave these loonies here in their funny farm where they can fantasise all day that they are making sense. Any more of this madness and we'll ALL be infected!
We’re outta here!!!
Copyright ©
steeleyes
... [
2004-11-01 19:25:55] (Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: THE LOONIES ARE RUNNING THE ASYLUM! :-)
(User Rating: 1 ) by ERiN_BuRgEr on
Thursday, 6th January 2005 @ 09:55:55 AM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
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Ha ha .... That was brilliant .....
Really funny .....
the whole bush thing shouldnt really be funny ......its pretty dangerous ....but it is ......
ha ha ha
Yeah , mate ....Thanks for making me laugh... |
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