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[The] House of Cold
Contributed by
bobotheclown
on
Sunday, 24th October 2004 @ 10:07:55 PM in AEST
Topic:
SadPoetry
|
Blood is spattered on my face
From these flying, broken fists
And from wiping away these tears of sorrow
With blood seeping through my fingers
Violent thoughts careening through my head
After I've been tested and fallen
Perfection I've sought for and haven't obtained,
But always lived with "not being good enough"
Prayed for the Dawn and the escape she brings
The loneliness and the peace for which I strive
And for Comfort which darkness seems to bring
I needed trust and love, but grabbed the hand of hate
Offering up silent prayers that seem to never be heard
Blinded by false accomplishments
As I mentally torture myself
Blood comes before the rain and the winter
Its hard to hide the truth
As my eyes they always betray
Crying as my tears are absorbed into the soft earth
You can tell where I've been
From the imprints left by my knees
Empty supplications for peace and prosperity
Staring at a blank, brick wall
That i've beaten until I left bloodied imprints
Emotional pain overriding the physical
I can never succeed... ***** failure
Copyright ©
bobotheclown
... [
2004-10-24 22:07:55]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: [The] House of Cold
(User Rating: 1 )
by Essentially9 on
Sunday, 24th October 2004 @ 10:21:36 PM AEST
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| powerful write. very well written. |
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Re: [The] House of Cold
(User Rating: 1 )
by Kindredblood_dragon on
Sunday, 24th October 2004 @ 10:25:14 PM AEST
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Ultimate in visual and realistic feelings were felt throughout reading this poem, Joel, this left me quaking and feeling the horrors you are going through and the agonies that are eating at your heart and mind, awesome write man, Hope that you find a way to break the barriers of sadness, and obtain the happinesss in which you seek, any time you wanna chat mate I am an email or pm away.
Dam good poem, from a pure master of emotions take care always dude.
Ya mate Karl |
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Re: [The] House of Cold
(User Rating: 1 )
by ShadowDaughter on
Sunday, 24th October 2004 @ 10:31:03 PM AEST
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Damn . . . Joel . . .
I need to catch my breath, reread this, and calm down, first, before I comment. *does so*
I'm sort of at a loss on what to say here, to be honest. On the one hand, it's truly beautiful. Wonderful. And the feelings are so familiar, I could have written them myself . . . though not nearly so well as you did here, of course. You brought a hell of a lot back, certainly, in the reading.
On the other hand, though, I sort of hate this. It's not wonderful, it's horrible. Not because of the way it was written or anything, just because I know a little too well exactly how awful it feels to just wake up every day and know that you are not enough, to feel like you never will be . . . and part of me recoils at how vividly, perfectly, honestly you portray it. Sort of like, I don't know, how dare he say it out loud, how dare he have to deal with something like that . . . how dare he make me face that feeling again, too. Or something.
Anyhow . . . I guess my two points are (if there's any point at all in this ramble), 1) this is perfect, 2) god . . . I'm so sorry.
And, Joel, I know how it feels and I'm most definitely not going to babble about how you are enough, and you will succeed, and you'll cheer up or something and blah blah blah. But . . . if it helps any at all . . . you're not alone.
bless,
Nora |
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Re: [The] House of Cold
(User Rating: 1 )
by Black13 on
Sunday, 24th October 2004 @ 10:51:02 PM AEST
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This has got to be one of the most refined poems you have written in a while... From what I've seen. Well you know what I mean I hope.
I do agree with Nora about this being breathtaking.
Stunning piece Joel.
Oh, and I took your comment on mine in a non-gay way. :D |
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Re: [The] House of Cold
(User Rating: 1 )
by Jenni_K on
Sunday, 24th October 2004 @ 11:02:08 PM AEST
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Amazing write, Joel.... perfection is never found.... It's not bad to be anything less than perfect... Keep trying..you will eventually succeed...
Hugs
Jenni |
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Re: [The] House of Cold
(User Rating: 1 )
by ladyfawn on
Sunday, 24th October 2004 @ 11:11:48 PM AEST
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beautifully heartfelt joel, its nice to see you again:) hugs n' love nessa
@->>->:- |
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Re: [The] House of Cold
(User Rating: 1 )
by immortal_pain on
Sunday, 24th October 2004 @ 11:24:11 PM AEST
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You know... I could waste my breath trying to rephrase everything that Nora said so that im not plagiarizing... or I could just say that I agree with every single word she typed in every way imaginable.
blessed be |
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Re: [The] House of Cold
(User Rating: 1 )
by katyqueen35 on
Monday, 25th October 2004 @ 02:26:05 AM AEST
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YOUR WRITE BROUGHT TEARS TO MY EYES.
IT'S SO SAD AND EMOTIONAL .I CAN TRUELY RELATED TO THIS.
EXCELLENT JOB.
HUGS
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Re: [The] House of Cold
(User Rating: 1 )
by blowfish_jane on
Monday, 25th October 2004 @ 04:20:27 AM AEST
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*totaly speechless* Nora just said everything im feeling.
Take Care
Jane x |
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Re: [The] House of Cold
(User Rating: 1 )
by Bohemian_with_a_pen on
Monday, 25th October 2004 @ 04:38:35 AM AEST
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| this is awesome! i love it, all ur work iz awesome. |
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Re: [The] House of Cold
(User Rating: 1 )
by Cancer on
Thursday, 10th March 2005 @ 12:30:16 AM AEST
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"I needed trust and love, but grabbed the hand of hate"
"Blinded by false accomplishments
As I mentally torture myself"
"You can tell where I've been
From the imprints left by my knees"
damn. that was...damn. vodka skittles and glitter for you.
51
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