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My man

Contributed by NoahsARK on Sunday, 3rd October 2004 @ 03:07:23 PM in AEST
Topic: LostLove

"Hey Baby" or "I miss you"
That's what he would say
"That is my girl"
"That is my boo"
I fell I'll melt away
My friends got their man
But theirs aren't like mine
They flirt all they can
But our love shines
But another girl came through
And took my man away
There was nothing I could do
That was definitly a dark day
And all I could do was cry
My man is gone
And I want him back
But no matter what happens
I know my friends got my back
I don't have him yet
But wait and see
One day that boy will come back to me

Copyright © NoahsARK ... [ 2004-10-03 15:07:23]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: My man (User Rating: 1 )
by thewordzwithin on Thursday, 14th October 2004 @ 02:41:34 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

Looks like I'm the first one to comment on this poem. Well let me start with, GREAT JOB! Very nice poem. I felt the emotion and understood where you were coming from. Only one thing, I don't know if you already knew this or not. And if so I'm sorry. In the fifth line I think you should have put, "feel" instead of, "fell". Or I might be wrong. That might be what you wanted. But other than that, I say good job. I just hope you don't let yourself get, "caught-up". Trust me, you sound about the same age is me or at least near it. You are a strong woman. I know this because deep inside all women is a strength no man has. Find that within yourself and you will forget about that dude in no time. Take it from me. When you love someone and you want them back, sometimes the love you have for that person is really just a craving for the attention that person gave you. If there is one piece of advice I could give you is to read, "The Path That Laid Before Me". It's a great poem on this site that talks about strength and walking your own path. No matter male or female, I wrote it to empower people like you. Gandee once said, "You must be the goal you want to see." If you want a change in your life, you must become change. Great Poem and I'll be reading some more. Holla Front!!!!!!!!!!! (Sorry I'm 19! I couldn't help it!)

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