|
 Menu
|
|
|
|
|
Social
|
|
|
|
|
Where Crystals Convalesce
Contributed by
EternitysLyre
on
Monday, 27th September 2004 @ 10:47:18 PM in AEST
Topic:
dedicatedpoems
|
Where everything is as it should and all is as it may
An evening, silent, simple, stood beneath a trembling day
Because the sunset shatters dawn and pine leaves cannot pray
Although the sunlit shards are strong steel splinters split each ray
But as the daylight crashes on and washes with the waves
The lunar beach draws tides undrawn and sanguine cinders slave
For balmy shores bring nevermore and fathoms friendly waves
And every sand stands small as it receives not what it gave
Caressed cheeks of crystal weeks bear witness to resolve
Beloved keepsakes strewn in heaps count crimson cares bled gray
Reflections of a shaky sun in dewdrop moons dissolve
Wherever winds will wear white wings
A sunspun whisper stays:
"Twinkle, twinkle, little star
Hiow I dreamed for things afar
Violet streaks of nightlong scars
Twinkle, twinkle, where you are."
Copyright ©
EternitysLyre
... [
2004-09-27 22:47:18]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
Advertisments:
|
|
|
|
|
|
Sorry, comments are no longer allowed for anonymous, please register for a free membership to access this feature and more
|
|
All comments are owned by the poster. Your Poetry
Dot Com is not responsible for the content of any
comment.
That said, if you find an offensive comment, please
contact via the FeedBack Form with details, including poem title
etc.
|
|
|
Re: Where Crystals Convalesce
(User Rating: 1 )
by Tanmaya on
Tuesday, 28th September 2004 @ 03:52:19 AM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
I absolutely loved this.
I would say this is one of the best poems I have read lately.
'An evening, silent, simple, stood beneath a trembling day'
'And every sand stands small as it receives not what it gave'
Brilliant...deep and inspired.
|
|
|
Re: Where Crystals Convalesce
(User Rating: 1 )
by Vitreous_Soul on
Tuesday, 28th September 2004 @ 05:29:27 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
I've come to love your affinity for aliteration, especially in lines such as "Although the sunlit shards are strong steel splinters split each ray." Also, the changing of rhyme scheme from stanza to stanza gives this a unique feel. I definitely want to be around when you complete this, as it already is something extremely special.
Obliterated by a speeding bus,
-V.S. |
|
|
|
· 
Poetry
Community
Members
Areas
Reference
Search
Top
Others
