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Permission to Fade
Contributed by
ShadowDaughter
on
Monday, 27th September 2004 @ 08:01:33 PM in AEST
Topic:
goodbyepoetry
|
somewhere in the shattered
[cliched, just like me]
fragments
of the mirror that reflected
all I ever thought I was,
one of the pieces
still catches my image
(maybe, maybe)
and I linger in it, almost a mirage,
waving and smiling
at an audience that claps
only to be polite
but in the real world,
no ray of light refracts
off those pieces of glass
and so no rainbow arcs across
the broken bits of early edition me
I am caught alone, unmasked,
denied my splintered mirrors
gasping and choking, though the smoke
has deserted me for a better pretender
exposed
to face myself
and I will let you fade away
I will let your hand escape my grasp
[I will fall to the floor
begging
kneeling on knees cut by glass and not caring
and believe in gods
just so there's someone to pray to
for you to stay
but I will make sure you are gone
and cannot see it happen
before I do]
I will whisper "I don't care"
and believe it, just for you
I will bite my lip and make you scarcely matter
and I'll watch,
forcing my eyes to bear witness,
as you fall away
and not try to stop you
I am letting you evanesce
diffuse into the air
(so were you ever really here?)
I am accepting I'll have no souvenir
no mist-memory solid enough
to convince myself of your existence
I am hearing your fleeting whisper
die into the night
without a goodbye whisper-kiss
[I always meant to say goodbye]
I am able, I am convincing myself,
to let you drift away and cope with it
I am standing alone
I am letting you go
and it's easy, so easy
but the face in the shatterclichefragments of mirror
looks me in the eye
(like you haven't in so long)
because it understands
and it murmurs, like a lullabye,
"I know, I know.
I know you never wanted
to convince yourself so well."
Copyright ©
ShadowDaughter
... [
2004-09-27 20:01:33]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Permission to Fade
(User Rating: 1 )
by Stitch on
Monday, 27th September 2004 @ 08:04:46 PM AEST
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Your poetry has an indescribable quality to it that is fascinating and cohesive. A very interesting write.
Stitch
PS I didn't know you were a skater. I was once. |
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Re: Permission to Fade
(User Rating: 1 )
by monophobic on
Monday, 27th September 2004 @ 08:08:02 PM AEST
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| why act tough? say all there is to say to him and if thats not enough, it simply wasn't meant to be...good write |
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Re: Permission to Fade
(User Rating: 1 )
by Cynthia on
Monday, 27th September 2004 @ 08:11:00 PM AEST
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| Nora, what a wonderful write. I can feel the emotion you poured into it. I would change a word of it. You did one heck of a job on this. *S* Cynthia |
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Re: Permission to Fade
(User Rating: 1 )
by eyesxcriedxout1989 on
Monday, 27th September 2004 @ 09:05:27 PM AEST
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| That was amazing...Overflowed with emotion, and then poured some more into the mixture...I could picture water marks on the original paper from tears....I loved this poem |
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Re: Permission to Fade
(User Rating: 1 )
by Essentially9 on
Monday, 27th September 2004 @ 09:18:01 PM AEST
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| excellent write nora. my favorite stanza was 3rd from last. =] |
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Re: Permission to Fade
(User Rating: 1 )
by ladyfawn on
Monday, 27th September 2004 @ 09:28:52 PM AEST
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awwww.... hugs n' love nessa
@->>->:-
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Re: Permission to Fade
(User Rating: 1 )
by Lee on
Monday, 27th September 2004 @ 09:45:02 PM AEST
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Poet at The Industrial Complex Nervous System says:
"Diffuse", now there's a word!
Favorite line worth me quoting:
"No mist-memory solid enough."
You've followed your poetic compass
To the coordinates of Well done! and
Jolly Good Show!
Or so it seems... |
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Re: Permission to Fade
(User Rating: 1 )
by pixie on
Tuesday, 28th September 2004 @ 06:35:40 AM AEST
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Nora you always pour your heart and soul into your writes and it really pays off, this is an exeptional write, filled with emotions and feeling,
great write,
pixie xx |
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Re: Permission to Fade
(User Rating: 1 )
by lostinmyself on
Tuesday, 28th September 2004 @ 06:43:35 AM AEST
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Damn girl O_O
I love this, it is one of your best i think.
I have no idea why, it calls to me.
I have a feeling i know what this poem is about, stay strong hunni.
I adore this. You have opened your heart and placed it on a page.
Much love to you,
Phil xxx |
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Re: Permission to Fade
(User Rating: 1 )
by Dorian on
Tuesday, 28th September 2004 @ 03:32:02 PM AEST
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My heart was breaking as i read this, profoundly tragic, profoundly beautiful, a Masterpeice of ones
inner strenght of letting go, not 2 mention a master peice of of writting . . . Dorian :
(((((((4 u)))))) |
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Re: Permission to Fade
(User Rating: 1 )
by Vitreous_Soul on
Tuesday, 28th September 2004 @ 05:37:11 PM AEST
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Rip my heart clean out of my chest, and proceed to reave it into two uneven parts. This is powerful Nora, very powerful--and the fact that it is written a bit roughly gives it an eerie, "real" feeling. This is so good (as a poem)..I just wish it wasn't true. Stellar work as usual, you've left me on the verge of tears.
With love (always Nora, always),
-Dan |
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Re: Permission to Fade
(User Rating: 1 )
by MoonlitAngel on
Wednesday, 29th September 2004 @ 10:06:24 PM AEST
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and I will let you fade away
I will let your hand escape my grasp
-- I love that part. Ooh and this may sound weird but the phrase "early edition me" sounds like a lyric matthew good would use, which makes it pretty cool in my books. lol. I don't totally get the beginning, but from the 4th stanza on, I can definitely relate. Another great write.
~ Dee
(who thinks you should go comment on lovesbane coz I finally commented on this :P) |
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Re: Permission to Fade
(User Rating: 1 )
by afraid_of_fear on
Thursday, 30th September 2004 @ 03:27:21 PM AEST
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wow Nora this is so, so beautiful..
i love it so much.
i can totally relate to it.
you have such a way with words.
i am completely in awe of this...
charlotte x_x_x |
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Re: Permission to Fade
(User Rating: 1 )
by Eve on
Friday, 1st October 2004 @ 02:50:24 PM AEST
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"I am caught alone, unmasked,
denied my splintered mirrors
gasping and choking, though the smoke
has deserted me for a better pretender"
... Yeah. Wow. Wow so, so many times. This is heartwork, Nora. And my favourite of your poetry as of this moment (I say this moment because it's hard for me to even do another injustice). So beautiful, and the last line - actually having a spoken portion - is gold.
Keep writing,
-Gerty. Eve. Whichever. The one sitting here gaping. |
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Re: Permission to Fade
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Monday, 4th October 2004 @ 09:07:11 PM AEST
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oh my nora.....very very powerful
You have much talent
and much emotion!
well done.
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Re: Permission to Fade
(User Rating: 1 )
by Silent-No-More on
Tuesday, 5th October 2004 @ 02:04:56 AM AEST
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Were I to have but one wish... I'd wish that I were brave enough to spit myself out onto the page and not then scramble to pick up the pieces before someone noticed. In other words, dear Nora - I wish I could write as you do.
There is nothing I can say that can do this justice. Nope... nuh uh... nothing. Yeh.. I could pull out some outrageously fabulous lines and drop them into my comment, remarking then at how terrific they are... but... frankly... they seem so exactly perfect just where they are - all of them - that I'm inclined to leave them there. I suppose... I'll just sit here in awe then.
Totalled by this,
SNM |
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Re: Permission to Fade
(User Rating: 1 )
by neveryours on
Wednesday, 13th October 2004 @ 03:17:12 PM AEST
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Yes! This is terrific - the best I have read from you. Some thoughts:
I think the poem really got started here:
and I will let you fade away
And it was so extraordinary from that point on, as here:
and believe in gods
just so there's someone to pray to
for you to stay
WOW
That I would just as soon see the first part deleted so that I could revel in the power of this last section from start to finish.
Full of emotion, and well done.
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Re: Permission to Fade
(User Rating: 1 )
by cuddlytiger17 on
Friday, 29th October 2004 @ 07:33:39 PM AEST
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Wow. I'm nearly speechless. I really wish I had your talent. You're poems are so abstract and hold so much emotion and depth. I'm in awe of your talent.
"but the face in the shatterclichefragments of mirror
looks me in the eye
(like you haven't in so long)
because it understands
and it murmurs, like a lullabye,
"I know, I know.
I know you never wanted
to convince yourself so well."
I'm thinking that you're my favorite writer on here. *bows to you* hehe.
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Re: Permission to Fade
(User Rating: 1 )
by SuicideParty on
Tuesday, 7th December 2004 @ 11:05:16 PM AEST
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I don't believe I've ever read a poem quite like this one. Having said that, I don't believe I've ever read a poem quite a good as this one. Having said that, I don't believe I'll ever write a poem quite as beautifully as this one.
This was...woah. I can't even begin to describe how moving/awe inspiring/hauntingly beautiful that was, and I don't think I'll even try.
I'll get back to you when I'm not so thoroughly revered by your talent and way with words.
~Sam |
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Re: Permission to Fade
(User Rating: 1 )
by Fionndruinne on
Friday, 4th March 2005 @ 04:42:19 PM AEST
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Well, my friend, I just happened to read this in (of all places!) the YPDC anthology. I read it aloud to a couple other poetry fans. This is truly incredible. And it makes more of an impact recited than off the page - I'm not sure why, but it does.
What a moving, powerful piece of writing. I had to come say so, since there wasn't quite room to scribble it in the book. Well done, well done!
Andrew
(happy to have this piece between book covers in his possession) |
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Re: Permission to Fade
(User Rating: 1 )
by Silent-No-More on
Friday, 4th March 2005 @ 05:24:50 PM AEST
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How happy I am to have noticed Andrew's comment here as it scrolled by on the home page. "Permission to" was all that it showed.... "Fade," my mind filled in. Oh! I remembered this.
And so I came back. And I read it again. I revisited my comment and knew that I still feel exactly the same. THEN... I read Andrew's comment. And it occured to me... I never did read this one aloud. And so I did.
And Oh! he is soooooooooooo very right - this is even more imactful when spoken. Long before I got to "and it's easy, so easy"... my voice was wavering. And that line - THAT line - I could barely force from my lips. Geesh, Nora - you are so incredibly talented... and this, such an incredible example of that.
I'll hush again now... i just couldn't not post here again after having read this once more.
*sigh* ok... yeh... hushing-
~Snem
(hmmm... first time I ever signed off that way, that is... somehow, my nickname dispensing friend - that just seems so wonderfully appropriate, you know?) |
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Re: Permission to Fade
(User Rating: 1 )
by shelliewilliams on
Thursday, 24th March 2005 @ 07:32:25 PM AEST
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| That was simply an unbelievable piece of work-I love it. |
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