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Those Eyes
Contributed by
poetmarie
on
Wednesday, 22nd September 2004 @ 02:55:05 PM in AEST
Topic:
LovePoetry
|
Gazing into your eyes, I explore the mystery of your soul.
Unique and mesmerizing; fire blazes there - sparks like
twinkling stars of the universe unbounded and free,
boldly staking their claim. Expressive, messengers of personality.
One look and I crumble inside, blood rising,
blushing affirmation of the heart. I cannot help but stare
wildly and intently into their beauty.
Gazing into your eyes, I am captured, a willing servant
of their desires.
Copyright ©
poetmarie
... [
2004-09-22 14:55:05]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Those Eyes
(User Rating: 1 )
by kidpoet_213 on
Wednesday, 22nd September 2004 @ 04:02:24 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
|
A nice write...
May I make a suggestion...? Instead of saying:
Gazing into your eyes... in my opinion... and this is just my opinion... I am not trying to tell u how to write it...
I think it would sound better if u would have said:
Gazing into those eyes...
Both times that u used that line... since that is the title...
Other than that... u have written a good poem...
~Donna~ |
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Re: Those Eyes
(User Rating: 1 )
by Dorian on
Wednesday, 22nd September 2004 @ 05:28:02 PM AEST
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a Message)
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What a charming poem, it swept me away so vivid
thank u 4 sharing it . . . Dorian : ) |
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Re: Those Eyes
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Saturday, 2nd October 2004 @ 04:02:27 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Beautiful. Wonderfully descriptive. You write with such emotion.
It was lovely to read.
~Breezy |
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