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Bloody Tears
Contributed by
tractorbabe
on
Monday, 20th September 2004 @ 07:56:14 PM in AEST
Topic:
DarkPoetry
|
Crying bloody tears
Telling white lies
That’s the way its gonna be
There’s no other comprise
Aint no one can know
Aint no one can see
These bloody tears
Are a stress relief
Bloody tears
That you’ll never see
Bloody tears
Are there for me
It’s hard to understand
The bloody tears I cry
To forget the pain
Of wanting to die
They never see it
You have to feel it to understand
It’s the feelin that comes
With the knife in your hand
It’s all this anger
You’ve kept for so long
And the bloody tears
Will never seem wrong
Bloody tears
That follow the knife
Bloody tears
Kill the pain of life
The bloody tears
That just keep fallin
The bloody tears
I just keep callin
This harsh angry feelin
Of wantin to die
The confusin feelin
Like the hole inside
As the bloody tears
Run down the knife
I wonder when
They’ll take my life
Copyright ©
tractorbabe
... [
2004-09-20 19:56:14] (Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Bloody Tears
(User Rating: 1 ) by Essentially9 on
Monday, 20th September 2004 @ 09:03:18 PM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
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excellent write. ive written about a lot of the things you did, and i thought you presented this very well. nice rhyme and rhythym. intriguing and emotionally powerful. the only thing i did not like about this was the word aint was used. most people do use it for rhythym and keeping that in pattern, so i can understand if you used it. its just one of the words i cant stand, and i live in alabama ::sigh::. well i hope all is going well and that you keep up the excellent writes. |
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Re: Bloody Tears
(User Rating: 1 ) by TheVoice on
Monday, 20th September 2004 @ 09:08:36 PM AEST (User
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a Message)
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Very powerful piece. I wish for the bloody tears to stop for you.
Peace,
The Voice
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Re: Bloody Tears
(User Rating: 1 ) by mylastwords on
Tuesday, 21st September 2004 @ 08:37:20 AM AEST (User
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a Message)
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beautiful emotional write...
keep it up coz uv got great talent...
i hope your bloody tears stop...and i hope mine do too...
xxooxx mylastwords xxooxx |
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Re: Bloody Tears
(User Rating: 1 ) by flamingblade on
Sunday, 9th September 2007 @ 09:54:12 AM AEST (User
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a Message)
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absolutely excellent
finally found another dark one that i think is fantastic
you did a wonderful job
keep them rolling in
Flamingblade |
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