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Your Love

Contributed by rookiepoet on Wednesday, 15th September 2004 @ 06:40:16 PM in AEST
Topic: LostLove



You changed my life for good
In so many, many ways
And though they're far and distant
I can still recall the days
When I would lie awake in darkness
Staring at the ceiling
Wondering if I ever
Could shake this awful feeling
That there was something wrong with me
Why couldn't I find love?
That someone had forgotten me
In heaven up above
But then you picked me up
And showed me I was wrong
That love was only waiting
Had been with me all along
You set me on a golden cloud
I floated endlessly
Basking in my happiness
Above for all to see
But just as seasons come and go
So must your love
Fleeting as snow
And even as I'm falling
From this cloud you set me on
I knew one day your love would fade
As swiftly as the dawn
Just like a shining butterfly
Touching quick from flow'r to flow'r
So does your love move restlessly
With every waning hour
Leaving with it's Gentle wings
A wake of pain and destruction
Carelessly and thoughtlessly
Demolishing all obstruction
So fragile hearts be wary
Lest you be devoured with ease
For love like yours is like a storm
Disguising as a breeze




Copyright © rookiepoet ... [ 2004-09-15 18:40:16]
(Date/Time posted on site)





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Re: Your Love (User Rating: 1 )
by SuicideParty on Wednesday, 15th September 2004 @ 07:26:40 PM AEST
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Ooh, wow. That was...wow! I mean, yeah, wow pretty much sums it up. *giggle* Sorry, I lose my eloquence when I'm dutifully awed.

Anyway, that was amazing. Really, really beautiful, and on a subject like the one you chose...*whistles* brilliant.

I love your work, seriously. I mean, it's just something I believe a lot of people can relate to.

And thanks for the comment on mine, but unfortunately my friend passed on a while ago. Suicide, obviously, but I think she'd appreciate the gesture anyway.

~Sam


Re: Your Love (User Rating: 1 )
by Pyrofungus on Wednesday, 15th September 2004 @ 07:41:47 PM AEST
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Damn that was great!
I went through something similar to what you went through...so very very similar...brought make memories from not to long ago...great poem bro!

please comment on my work too
summer


Re: Your Love (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Wednesday, 15th September 2004 @ 08:37:30 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)
This was beautifully written.
You captured feelings of
both euphoria and anguish.
Well done!

~Breezy


Re: Your Love (User Rating: 1 )
by Bruce on Wednesday, 15th September 2004 @ 10:29:42 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)
beautifully written, i wish the outcome had been better for you




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