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From the Pit
Contributed by
Hurretje
on
Sunday, 12th September 2004 @ 03:20:58 AM in AEST
Topic:
DarkPoetry
|
Sneaky stars enter my vision
Shining peaks disturb my rest
Set out on a secret mission
To disturb my sleeping zest
Gaping breaches, harsh and fierce
Open big mouths in my walls
Those light beams just poke and pierce
Till all I’ve built sighs and falls
Without mercy they attack
Crack and clefts grow in my shanks
Hidden peace has to draw back
No! I cry, Just close the ranks!
This black vortex starts to dance
Shows its depths in a scaring gape
My invincible defense
No jack-o’-lantern can escape
Never will I give in to this
There’s no room for joyful bliss
Burning pieces I’ll tear apart
In this pit that was my heart
Copyright ©
Hurretje
... [
2004-09-12 03:20:58]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: From the Pit
(User Rating: 1 )
by venkat on
Sunday, 12th September 2004 @ 03:40:45 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| great images from mind's space.. as if drwn from the core of subconscious emotions...it is a marvellous poem. venkat |
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Re: From the Pit
(User Rating: 1 )
by MomentInTime on
Sunday, 12th September 2004 @ 07:45:56 AM AEST
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I will echo Venkat's comments
Great write
Jordan oxo |
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Re: From the Pit
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Sunday, 12th September 2004 @ 09:01:51 AM AEST
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A very deep thought excellently penned.
wildejohnny. |
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Re: From the Pit
(User Rating: 1 )
by thumper on
Sunday, 12th September 2004 @ 09:31:23 AM AEST
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Let the light shine in!! Make room for joyful bliss!! ;o) I truely enjoyed this write, sounds like your fortress is breaking down. Great flow and meaning. Peace to you, (((HUR)))
Thumps ; 0) |
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Re: From the Pit
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Sunday, 12th September 2004 @ 11:29:24 AM AEST
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Hurretje, a little happiness will not kill you. Come on into the light with the other optimistic fools ike me. It is actually very nice here with lots of laughter, love, faith and hope.
(you know you want too) lol
Hugs,
Rita (aka) Sissy Sunshine |
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Re: From the Pit
(User Rating: 1 )
by Silent_Composer on
Wednesday, 15th September 2004 @ 06:17:51 AM AEST
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Your poetry astounds me you seem to know how to catch the readers imagination and hold it, This poem saga you have going is awesome as its plot unfolds.
~Silence~ |
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Re: From the Pit
(User Rating: 1 )
by Fionndruinne on
Sunday, 19th September 2004 @ 08:35:59 PM AEST
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Sometimes the Light seems that way: burning, searing brightness, shredding the last of our fugitive peace. But the only thing there is to do, really, is, throw yourself straight into the blaze. Lose yourself, and in the revealing Light, you will find yourself.
Excellent piece.
Andrew |
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