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Hell
Contributed by
Firestarter1038
on
Friday, 10th September 2004 @ 10:22:40 PM in AEST
Topic:
DarkPoetry
|
Hell
Once upon a time,
the clock was ticking,
louder and louder,
until twelve times it chimed,
And who was that sitting,
alone on the bed,
waiting for a call,
from someone already dead,
And the screams,
left in your wake,
echoed the city,
and shook the lake,
Whose heart bleed harder,
I can not judge,
while yours dripped blood,
mine poured love,
The thought of a knife,
held tight in your hand,
betraying yourself,
on red stained sand,
And who's in hell now?
I know its not you,
because I'm here alone,
wishing you were here too.
Copyright ©
Firestarter1038
... [
2004-09-10 22:22:40]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Hell
(User Rating: 1 )
by emystar on
Friday, 10th September 2004 @ 10:29:18 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Very sad but written well.
huggs, smiles,
emy |
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Re: Hell
(User Rating: 1 )
by Silent_Composer on
Friday, 10th September 2004 @ 10:39:12 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Sad and emotional, nicely written and composed, very well done.
~silence~ |
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Re: Hell
(User Rating: 1 )
by JT on
Friday, 10th September 2004 @ 10:47:46 PM AEST
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a Message)
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great write, well built. Liked the last verse alot.
-jt- |
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Re: Hell
(User Rating: 1 )
by arden on
Friday, 10th September 2004 @ 11:14:38 PM AEST
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a Message)
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hmm interesting.
dark, sad, emotional. good poem.
well written even though it seemed a bit simple. but it was still awesome.
great work. keep it up.
Arden |
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Re: Hell
(User Rating: 1 )
by Essentially9 on
Friday, 10th September 2004 @ 11:26:53 PM AEST
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| amazing write. |
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Re: Hell
(User Rating: 1 )
by katyqueen35 on
Saturday, 11th September 2004 @ 12:05:48 AM AEST
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Wow i say this is deep.
such details.good job. |
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Re: Hell
(User Rating: 1 )
by tifrob on
Saturday, 11th September 2004 @ 07:10:25 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Truly sad. The reader hurts for you.
J~ |
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