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Before Crashing
Contributed by
Merry
on
Friday, 10th September 2004 @ 09:12:49 PM in AEST
Topic:
DarkPoetry
|
_________________
kicking up dirt
into their pasty faces
waiting
react
knee jerk
loser
no good for life
turn your back on them
because they turn their backs on you
twisted
it hurts
too deep inside to tell
too dark inside your hell
swearing in their faces
kick up dirt
as if you can make your point
as if they haven't already sentenced you
loser
no good
chained to your birthright
sinking with the weight of tears
kicking up dirt
stumbling
fumbling through the world
because nobody understands you
can't put it in words
feelings
burn like rage
what will become of you
they keep asking
as if you know the answer
Copyright ©
Merry
... [
2004-09-10 21:12:49]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Before Crashing
(User Rating: 1 )
by Silent_Composer on
Friday, 10th September 2004 @ 09:15:20 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Woah this overflowed with intense emotions, it is a very gripping poem, very well written, and I liked it alot.
Thank you for sharing.
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Re: Before Crashing
(User Rating: 1 )
by Essentially9 on
Friday, 10th September 2004 @ 09:35:38 PM AEST
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a Message)
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great write. i liked the way your write was composed. powerful.
"what will become of you
they keep asking
as if you know the answer" for some reason this part of your poem stood out to me most. i guess it was because it was so true in the logical form and i never even thought of the concept like that. fantastic ending.
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Re: Before Crashing
(User Rating: 1 )
by Firestarter1038 on
Friday, 10th September 2004 @ 10:44:42 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| Really great poem! It's true, and I can actually relate to it. You did a wonderful job in expressing feelings and emotions that can be hard to put in words at times! |
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Re: Before Crashing
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Friday, 10th September 2004 @ 11:26:53 PM AEST
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a Message)
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echoing silent composerss comment this is packed with emotion, very well written verse.
wildejohnny. |
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Re: Before Crashing
(User Rating: 1 )
by ladyfawn on
Thursday, 16th September 2004 @ 08:18:37 PM AEST
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excellent, i love your perspective here gaille, hugs n' love nessa
@->>->:- |
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Re: Before Crashing
(User Rating: 1 )
by Stitch on
Saturday, 18th September 2004 @ 07:42:07 AM AEST
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a Message)
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Oh, I love this. I have two adolescents now, and I'm beginning to feel this from them, and recall it in myself. You have described that unnameable thing that so disrupts us all.
Stitch |
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